thank you Lord for this day

2010-06-09T13:57:00.002+12:00

the past two weeks have been really hectic, but awesome

obs week first(:-24th to 28th may 2010
day1:
first, i met jerian to go to school together, met brandon at jp and then went to get 1.5l bottles(:
and we then headed off to sch, were pretty late.
bus trip down to obs, bag felt like it was killing me.(but after the trekking activity, my personal bag felt like heaven)
first day was basically just mingling, socializing, learning how to pitch a tent, food rationing and to cook dinner:D
roland kind of hit over shackleton pot of rice by accident, poor him, he felt so guilty.
but its okay, we don't mind:D After all, nice tenzing shared with us there rice.
dinner was chilli anchovies, rice, instant noodles, peanuts and sardines.
(lunch and breakfast is seriously corrupt: biscuits and layer cakes, etc!-the week where i ate the most biscuits in my life)
first night camp site was good, but stupid mozzies kept buzzing by my ear.
ohh and we played catching after dinner, super fun(: when we were supposed to be bathing, but we didnt know:S
day2:
woke up bright and early.
learned how to belay people, did rock climbing.
i failed at the vertical and supposedly harder wall.
climbed the one everybody was supposed to.
i felt stressed being the last one to go:(scared that i could not do it.
halfway, my hand started to bleed, but i must say thankyou to eugene and bihao who helped me alot(:( oh and the other two guys, i think paul and someone....)
haha made my life easier when i got stuck.;D
moved off to camp1; camp1 is heavenly...haha but i feel that i have more memories in camp2.
but camp2 night site is better though its more ulu.
day3:
went for kayaking expedition to collect holy mud
the instructors said we were fast.
i guess i had allergy to mud/seawater/heat?
had alot of rash after coming out of the water,
jerian and i couldn't kayak straight, then other people kept laughing at us since we were supposed to be the portsmarker. pengsiang and leng khoon helped us next, turned out that jerian and i had little coordination.ended up banging into lots of tree branches in the mangrove swamp:(
jerian and eugene got seasick halfway...eat orange eat orange!!!!!
and then we exchanged life rocks when back on shore, i was desperate to pee i remember, cause i was reluctant to pee in the sea like everybody did.moved off to stay in camp3
camp3 campsite sucked, had lots of red ants and it was super rocky.they said that the campsite wasnt used in months .:( and it was super difficult to get to the campsite, grassy overgrown sloping narrow track.:X first time we went up, quite a number of ppl tripped.
dinner time, all of us were cooking.
lighting and thunder came, the guys set about to set up shelters with ponchos and when our bag were all piled together, i lost my bag O.o the guys were awesomely fast and smart.haha but we all felt super scammed cause it didnt rain after all. and there were dark clouds all around but not directly above us.
there was a shooting star too.:D but i didnt see it.
sharlene started to click on and click off her torchlight in ppl faces to pretend it was a shooting star.epic.
and the guys came up with this cheer:
-paul howls-
guys:ooh ooh ah ah
ooh ooh ah ah
girls: rv sexaye!
girls:ooh ooh ah ah
ooh ooh ah ah
guys:rv happy
mad cheering(;
campsite was hard, but i was too tired fell asleep soon.
heard chants at night, lots of ppl got scared.
but it was only malay prayers.
LOL ><
Day 4:
Trekking in the jungle to collect the holy water
we took a wrong turn, ended up walking much more.
the backpack half killed me and it started to pour heavily even before we embarked.had to wear ponchos, look like fat little ducklings what with our huge bags.
half died during trekking, but accomplished it:D
and then had quarry jumping, super fun to play in the clear water:D you can see your legs and stuff(:
trekked back.
had the zero displacement thing, my shoe kept getting stuck in the mud.we were supposed to go through a short cut but after40 to 45 min of meandering through the forest and skidding down minature slopes, we were back where we were. thought they were playing a sick joke on us but then turned out it was because no one had taken this path for very long and that there was some flooding in the pathway:(eventually reached camp2
got back to camp, was ever so happy to bathe, yay we bathed everyday
cooked and jerian was epic.
he stacked the cooked food tgther and the toothpaste from one mass tin dripped into the eggs in the bottom mass tin.epic funny(:
dinner was self cooked with fresh ingredients
brandon wee and i cooked eggs too, they wanted friend eggs, but we ended up with scrambled eggs cause i thought scrambled eggs were fried eggs:(
haha paul was the taster, his face got this very shocked look when he ate, the food was prolly not very nice.but later, he actually came and told me brandon and mine was one of the best there.hehe at least someone appreciates our effort(:
the campsite on day4 was good, dont know why they didnt let us used it on day1
day 5:
packing up time. started to feel sad, kind of.
though i was lamenting during trekking hehe:D
did the planting of our trees,
and shackleton and tenzing gave roland and kerrie two real leaves, with thankyou messages on them.both of them rocked.poor kerrie, with jellyfish sting on her eye.ohh we saw lots of jellyfish when kayaking!!!
got back to sg, was thankful, was flooded with messages(Mostly work:( )
bought to collared tees, wanted to get this super new design tee, but out of stock alr:X
sheesh.

okay, i shall save posting about caps for tmr(:

2010-05-15T22:02:00.003+12:00

its been a really long time since i last posted
and many things have happened over this period of one month.my perceptions to things have matured in more ways than one due to the experience i have gained along the way
and sometimes, this is what i realized
don't help people to do things(well, at least some people), they might say thankyou at first and be really grateful that you help me do that, and when they change their mind, they turn around and bite you(in the literal,not physical sense)
at least this is what i realized today.
this few days, life had been really tiring for me, what with coucil meetings, activities, exams etc.
During the talk, Mr Koh mentioned that we could choose cca in yr5 if we believed that we can cope with council, our cca and studies.
i'm kind of set on taking up a sports cca, i hope that i will be able to cope.
so i guess i should start working on my studies when i can so that i will also be on par with my peers during the school term when the workload and busy schedule comes down on me.
wonder if i can keep this resolve, im not sure, but at least i shall give it a shot.
actually sometimes, when i get unhappy in badminton training, i wished i could graduate faster, but now i have an immense sense of nostalgia, esp. about the teammates part.. but this four years of journey made me think harder and learn more in many ways.
moving on, about the examinations
the results received are not bad i guess, physics, one mark to a1...:(
but then the rest of the papers yet to received, i'm not sure.
for all the papers not yet received, i feel a sense of insecurity.
i guess i should have worked harder then instead of always pushing stuff to the last minutes, and when something suddenly crops up, i don't have the time to study.

lastly, i should seriously stop commenting on people...
truthfully speaking, everyone bitches about someone else and i'm no exception,
i should start to be more optimistic and stop complaining,to add on, i should start learning to accept others more instead of being a stuck up snob. i must work on it...

2010-05-09T12:34:00.000+12:00

IM BECOMING A NO-LIFER.

2010-05-09T12:33:00.001+12:00

life's been really tiring and rushed:(
lack of sleep and stuff, no sports for two weeks bummer!
BUT I SHALL START TO BE OPTIMISTIC AND PLAN MY TIME BETTER:)

2010-04-18T12:36:00.002+12:00

i dont know whether to go for the yunnan trip or the obs one
im worried that the yunnan trip will clash with the CAPS programme(yes, im glad i got into caps:D)
but then im also worried that i will not get into the yunnan trip and i wasted my opportunity into getting to go to obs
i wish the details to the yunnan trip will be concrete, its giving me alot of headache:(

2010-04-11T01:46:00.000+12:00

I’m posting once again because of the sudden wash of emotions that has gripped me
Many things have happened over the course of the past few months
Somehow, I feel myself becoming one who thinks much more and more cautious of doing things as well as weighing things such as how much it will benefit me. I am getting more calculative and picky on people. I am starting to fail to accept people on who they are and now, actually go to the extent of returning provocative comments when someone angers me. I am no longer able to curb my anger that well, possibly because I am becoming more and more status conscious as well as arrogant. I want to curb this aggressive emotions from erupting. They are just basically emotions, not really the eruptive kind. I could bring them into check, but i wish I wouldn’t have those mean thoughts of wanting to hurt, to rebut.

and magic does emotions to the soul
there are risks to everything if you want to do something great
its whether you are willing to take the risk or not

2010-04-11T01:18:00.000+12:00

Check this guy out!

I was on youtube, looking for certain songs and I stumbled upon this video by Jordan Jansen

He looks quite like justin bieberO.Owhat with the same hairstyle, guitar and the dressing style(:

He’s pretty talented and got a great voice, not to mention good looks

Looks like there’s gna be another young star too, I guess its true that young male stars are handsome(look at aaron carter, Jessie mccartney, justin bieber, and now Jordan Jansen)

I’m starting to think that I’m a really mean person. I’m serious, I know myself best.

2010-04-07T20:07:00.002+12:00

my shoulders have blisters from the sunburnt and even my scalp is peeling. ew, gross man:(

i keep getting distracted by small little things when i should be studying
i have big dreams of getting into medical sch, but i dont seem to be doing anything to achieve it
im a bummer, a big lazy pig:(
sheesh, i should srsly work harder instead of building all those castles in the hair before they all come crumbling down and there i am feeling the same shit like feeling like i did when i was p6
but the past is the past and i should look forward, but im still committing the same mistake
why i even get distracted by the computer? and frankly speaking, guys too:(
its time i wake myself up but somehow im failing to do so.
im burying myself deeper even as i try to extricate myself from this rubble of self destruction.

2010-04-06T00:32:00.003+12:00

my whole face is peeling now, and so i have some splotches of whiter skin
people are prolly going to think i have got some skin disease:(

and anw the sentosa outing was fabulous!!!
haha and i had an awfully awesome time bimbo-ing with lydia and shudan
new members of bimbo club: kirsten, rachel and cheryl
anw, we started off with poking the jellyfish and we were hunting for stone fish
and we used sticks to poke jellyfish.hehe was telling lydia the tree would haunt her
and we definitely had an awesomely bimbo time together.
hey lydia and shudan, SHUAI GE HUNTING GOOGLES-LEFT TO RIGHT
shudan was saying how ugly the ah bengs were and i was commenting that their underwear very lao ah pek
and one guy overheard and went like "eh she say our underwear lao ah pek leh"
but seriously it is! strips and checkered.if want to flash, please wear a branded one, like maybe Calvin Klein. okay why am i talking about this here. and why did i even raise this topic.
okays maybe i shouldnt be talking about this cause its inappropriate, but i want to rmb this incident when i grow old so i should write it down.:D
IM REALLY DARK NOW
kuanyuan says i look like charcoal:(
and cant rmb who said that when i smile, my teeth glimmers cause my face is too dark:(

2010-03-28T12:36:00.001+12:00

people never do react normally when i sneeze.
ironical.maybe im allergic to them
TEEHEE!!

2010-03-20T22:50:00.002+12:00

i just had 11/20 for the graded maths quiz, its by far the most horrible result
qihao was like "seriously, you need tuition"
yeah, my differentiation sucks and in a blink of an eye my whole march holidays have gone
the sc camp was fun
day one:
met yiteng and julia at jp first and i was late, my bag was kind of too fat to pass through the turnstile.
went for ice breakers and stuff and then we had a seminar. and omg i was separated from any year 4 girls. same group as brandon and junyuan. hey thankyou brandon and junyuan for being so awesome during the camp, eg offering to wake up to accompany me if i needed to go to the toilet at night, for just hanging out together always, for making me laugh during the camp, for being such great friends as we went into the haunted ramp etc.
yeah it was wayy awkward at first cause the rest were mainly previous sc and they were not from our level.
during the weird dance at the start i paired with julia.
mass dance after lunch it was fun, paired with qihao, awkward slow dancing.
everybody was kind of nervous about touching each other cause it was guy girl.
haha and then qihao was asking: eh why is your hand so cold?"
and i replied "of course its cold. im nervous what"
and he said"yeah me too. my hand super sweaty."
it was okay in the end but we had a interesting conversation.
did banner painting and i threw away my socks cause it became too colourful!
night time stuff was night trail, it was pretty awesome.
hahs i was kind of scared of the dark
and then night time was super cold and we slept near one plus
the auction for food was cool, seriously, first in my lifetime
second day:
we had pt early in the morning. yeah brandon and i kept grumbling we were hungry. brandon have a great appetite, he ate like 10 chicken wings and two plates of rice!double portion per meal.
water games were fab and super wild but it was kind of icky to have soap on me the whole day so i kept washing it off.
there was a soap piling game and they decided to use my hair.after that it was disastrous...
it keep entering my eye:(
i have yet t get my revenge on yili, yiteng and francis
francis rubbed soap on my face and squirted this water bag at me. so happened i turned around and the soap water entered my mouth.its great im still living now:)
and then yiteng and yili sneaked up to me and rubbed my hair with even more shampoo;(
this jj facilitor, i have yet to get my revenge but never will cause i wont be seeing him anymore.
he sneaked up from behind and burst two bangs right in my face just when i was drying off:(
and then when i got a water bag to get my revenge on francis, the fac burst the water bag in my face. i kind of " ehh i wanna take revenge one leh"
and he was like"okay i get you another one"
and he took two, so i was thinking what a nice guy
and in the end, he burst the water bags in my face again-.-
zzz
f1 did a group danc, with the song love story by taylor swift.
my partner was beihua, he's a great guy. as usual, the slow dancing part was awkward, what with touching the girl's waist and all but beihua kind of made me feel comfortable cause he didnt make a big deal out of it
(: sc night was awesome, disco lights and all
i could not get high at first.was playing around with others
francis and ernchuen were super cute.they tied balloon to their specs.
ernchuen was saying: maybe if i tie more balloons to my specs, i will float.super funny(:
rachel and elizabelle were really nice(:
and i made a new friend who was sleeping beside me: qing ye, she's interesting(:
third day:
warm up and stuff:D
did cleaning up
and then went for a eweb thing, i lost the pink ribbon that benny gave us:(oh well
but our string got tangled so we didnt use it.
went to dance studio for group briefing, the stuff said were really emotional and lots of ppl cried. it made me reflect alot.
and yiming, thanks for comforting even though you were crying yourself;D
the whole sc lunched together with their respective families.
and benny told me he thought i was manly.
should take up on qihao's offer in hiring a bimbo to teach me to be ladylike(:

2010-03-12T03:50:00.001+12:00

Recently, over the past few days, I have been reflecting and I believe that I have not been a tolerant person over the past few years. Patience and tolerance have never been my strong suit. Undoubtedly, I am henceforth jealous for really nice people like elysha and joanne because really, their hearts are well, talking in the golden sense, are pretty golden. I have been wondering why they are able to be so tolerant and what have enabled them to do so.

On the other hand, I am always one to express my opinions openly or hint of my displeasure if someone annoys me. It is neither beneficial for me nor the other party, but I haven’t exactly succeeded in curbing my temper. Indeed, it is true that everyone will have their strong and weak suits but I feel that overcoming this hurdle will bring me one step further.
Looking back, I realized that I have wasted a lot of my time on nonsensical stuff, and what’s more, I have been consciously doing it. I know something will do me no good but yet for the short term pleasure, I do it. Its kind of guess a moment of folly or mental blindness. Its time to quit this and focus on advancing myself in various aspects, if only I have the foresight to do so. But at least, if I did make an effort, there will be a consolation that I tried.
Moving on, I think I will be considering literature for one of my contrasting subjects next year. No, I do not regretting taking geography for these two years, it has indeed been a fulfilling journey for me, opening my eyes to what the ignorant mentality of mine would have blocked off. Furthermore, I must say that madam tan is a pretty interesting teacher, well, she makes the lessons easy to understand and clear cut, which is what I thoroughly admire and respect in a teacher.
There’s an article in the latest issue of newsweek talk about teachers having an iron rice bowl. Indeed, this has been the centre of heated debate that some particular teachers who have failed terribly in their duties in being a teacher have not yet been dismissed. On the other hand, certain teachers are overworked and yet underpaid. It’s true, in many countries around the world. There should be a anonymous feedback session provided for us to give our views on certain particular teachers who have gone the extra mile and also certain particular teachers who have fallen even below the basic role of being a teacher.

2010-03-06T01:48:00.002+12:00

My birthday was great, thanks(:
i was upset no one sang me a birthday song.haha this sounds so immature of me
yuning, hsiaotien, tszkiu, heping amelia and wenhui gave me a 1m long stuffed banana
can be used as a nice bolster
and wenting gave me nice belgian chocolates
mengni gave me nice belgian chocs too(:
jerian gave me a pretty notebook from art box, super cool one, it got a continuous comic from the start to the end of the book at the corner of every page
yantong, alicia, weiying and wenting gave me a super pretty metallic bookmark
rachel gave me a super cute monkey, you can even pull its arm
joanne jiayin enting and zixin gave me bangles and a necklace
jasmine gave me a bobble head toy(:
HOPE I DIDNT LEAVE ANYBODY OUT AND THANKS TO THE MANY PEOPLE WHO WISHED ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY ON FACEBOOK/MSN/SMS
earliest person to write on fb, 12 midnight: jerian
earliest person to text: francis at 11.59 on 1st march
if you count junyuan who wished me earlier on sunday cause he's going to penang, then is junyuan
or it will be taylin who smsed exactly at 12 midnight
first person to wish me on the day itself: heping
last person to wish me : gary at 11.59 pm on 2nd march
haha(:
happy happy happy
ranking's tmr and my physical is still shit like with me still being sick

2010-02-28T12:02:00.002+12:00

My nose feels super congested and i got a bad cough;(

last night went to grandma's house to celebrate her birthday and kind of mine too;D
will be going out later with my family to celebrate mine later, but what about homework?:(
on wed, our class was late for lang arts cause we forgot it was in the seminar room
then when we reached there mr yee was like asking "whose the class chairpersons?"
so raimie and i stood up and we were rewarded with the punishment of writing about a dragon and a princess and the moral that we should not forget things.
its pretty fun writing a story about leg hair, but only if i didnt have tests:(
for bio, i kind of confused circular muscles with ciliary muscles and concave lens with convex lens.the worse is that most of which i studied for didnt come out:(as in what people normally expect to come out didnt come out
physics, i used the wrong data.ARGH

2 MORE DAYS TO MY SWEET SIXTEEN:)

2010-02-14T03:18:00.002+12:00

i can't believe its the lunar new year again so soon again.
but this year round, i did not return to peihwa:(

let me first talk about the zonals(:
we did not manage to get into the third round but for the first time in years we got through to the second round into the top 8 west zone schools:D
but this year's zonals had allowed us to have opportunities to bond with our juniors
this year's zonals have allowed me to understand that life isn't fair
up to this turning point in life, i have always had the conception that if you worked hard and put in effort, you will succeed and henceforth, be able to get what you want.
but this time round, even though i had put in my all for badminton, my coach kind of let me play the matches against the schools that we were bound to lose.oi admit i was pretty upset and this mattered alot to me because its the first year whereby i didnt get to play all the matches in the west zones. it might sound as if i was being selfish but this is a matter of pride and my perspective to life i guess.anw charmaine cheer up okay:D haha we are in the same boat and i can totally comprehend how you feel.your words helped the most because you know exactly how i felt and then your words were to the point.haha anw thanks to the rest who have comforted me though sometimes the points didnt really hit home cause unless you experience it yourself, you can't possibly understand.but thanks anw, i still appreciate it.
OMG CHARMAINE I CANT BELIEVE YOU CONFESSED TO ME.THAT GOT TO BE THE FIRST(OKAY, MAYBE NOT BUT STILL YOU'RE A GIRL)but i supposed you are joking. anw i shall post what she said to me cause i can laugh at it when i am 60 years old and wrinkled.

in school's canteen with my horrible pimple hidden under my plaster, i was self conscious
charmaine: hey i think i've fallen for you
huiwen: YEAH RIGHT.You got to be kidding me.

in kranji sec school hall during zonals against pioneer,talking random stuff
charmaine: what i said still stands
huiwen: what?
charmaine: that i like you

charmaine:hey when you graduate must come back training more if not i cannot see you alr
huiwen: OMG THATS SO GAY.but i might not have the time

at choa chu kang mrt there,
charmaine: wah you never add me on msn or facebook plus dont even have my number. must sms me okay?
huiwen: why?cannot la my sms bao alr
charmaine: Like i said, i...
huiwen: EEYER DONT CONTINUE

haha but i think she's interesting and wayy hilarious, zomg this type of stuff also can think of to joke about.ANW PDA(PUBLIC DISPLAY OF AFFECTION!!) KAIXIN SUDDENLY HUGGED ME AT CCK MRT AND WAS SAYING "I LOVE YOU".I SURE WAS STUNNED AND SHE WAS LIKE "EH WHY YOU NEVER HUG BACK?"this creeped me out cause she's not normally like that

i think there was so many people who laughed at me when i plastered my pimple. alot of people i encountered looked at me and then burst out laughing. to think i was so innovative to cut the plaster into a teeny weeny piece:(in the end i used the whole piece to be not so weird but then more people laughed including teachers:(don't know where to hide my face

friday, went orchard with oonhim after cny celebrations:D
yeah mrs look passed the skirts of my class girls:D a call for celebration
anw i dont see why we were caught since tightness was not a criteria and our skirts were not tight at all since almost everyone had the small creases when walking-.-
yeah oonhim and i talked alot, its like a lot of catching up to do:(
haha ps for making you pangseh your friend but then im not sorry that we had a fun day. thanks for helping me find dresses.
haha in the end, i bought one dress pants for nichii at 313 orchard.i didnt get the forever 21 striped dress cause there were seriously lots of people purchasing it then i felt like a copycat if i did so too.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S PEOPLE.3 MORE MINUTES TO 12.
NOW I SHALL WAIT FOR 12.
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY<3
HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR:)

2010-02-10T00:34:00.002+12:00

it seems like nobody else cares, so why am i trying to save the friendship?
today was kind of upsetting but i don't want to talk about it
but talking to charmaine made me feel much better:D
after competition, we lost 0-5 to kranji,
we had a pretty good time with cold jokes, camwhoring and wendy was cleaning her sweat on people!
they had a great time laughing at my chinese! OHKAYYY I SHALL SPEAK MORE CHINESE FROM NOW ON.
HAHA IN THE END THEY WERE ASKING ME TO SHUT UP CAUSE IT WAS TOO "horrible" as quoted by them!hmph, i shall study hard and show you all okay!
but its like finally that i am starting to see the bonds forming between the juniors and us:D
gosh i hate my pimple.many thanks to the binging of chocolates.

2010-02-06T02:35:00.002+12:00

i realised that i have posted 333 blog posts and thats such a nice number
this will be my 334th post.
talking about badminton, we proceeded into the next round after winning newtown and huayi while losing to nanhua.
so currently we are in the zonals top 8, its a feat for us okay since we havent made it this far for the past few years.
everyone was joking that if we ever proceed to the next round, we will each ahve a car to send us to the competition venue upon seeing that the coach sending us there is much bigger, more cooling and have more plushy seats.
i made friends with meifang(OMG SHE IS SUPER IMBA!)
i went up to her and said "hey, where's joey?"(i wanted to ask joey to intro us:D
but then joey was empiring so i decided to self intro:D
me: hey can i make friends with you?
meifang look shocked that i ask.
then she said "yeah sure sure!"
heh then i turned back to rejoin my team and tripped over the red tape and stumbled.
OMG SO EMBARRASSING, no thanks to coach daniel and clemm who laughed so loudly!
haha coach daniel said i really lived up to my nick name "gao3 xiao4":(

stuff happened today but sometimes, we cant just blog about it cause we will get into deep trouble if we do so. so what about the freedom of speech? i don't think such a thing really exists, not in the past and certainly not in the present or future. but yet, somehow i think its only fair that one can post about a certain day of unhappiness without wondering if his/her posts would create trouble or removed.

2010-01-30T00:55:00.002+12:00

OMG TODAY I AM SO HAPPY
CAUSE DURING TRG I ASKED MR TAN IF WE SPORTS PEOPLE ARE GOING TO HAVE OBS
I WAS PREPARED TO BE DISAPPOINTED AND WHEN HE SAID "YEAH"
I WAS THINKING "AM I DREAMING?"
SO I WAS LIKE "CONFIRM ALR?"
AND HE WAS LIKE "YES"
AND I WENT "OMG, WHEN?"
AND HE SAID "LAST WEEK OF TERM 2.24-28 MAY"
YEAH MANNN.AWESOME, I AM SO HAPPY.
SO NOW MY MSN PM IS " HEY SPORTS PEOPLE LETS GET APESHIT CAUSE THERES GNA BE OBS FOR US:D
yeah im so gna go facebook to let them all know
cause i can totally comprehend how they felt the last few days
WOOHOO.
and thankyou hueychyi for comforting me:D
haha now your turn to wish me thunderstorms

2010-01-29T00:18:00.002+12:00

the past few days i have been avoiding the computer the like it is the plague when even exams could not get me off the internet for such a long period. APPLAUDS ME NOT BEING ABLE TO GO OBS:(
not really anyone to talk to online anyway
the people in my level are away except those frm sports, cldds, ponners and those medically unfit.yeah and if i talk to them, i'll just be a whiny person grumbling about my awful fate about not going obs.
since i decided to spare others the fate of hearing me grumble, im not online for the past few days.spent them sleeping though.
and talking to the seniors or juniors would be bad cause it would mean explaining why i could not go obs and that would remind me of obs
oksy monday tues and wed there was spotcheck:C HORIBBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE.
yeah then we were all at the hall sadly looking as the people going obs left. you can just imagine the long faces we were pulling.
and then the lessons were okay i guess, played monopoly tycoon on the computers.
tuesday and wednesday was utterly boring, and we(referring to netball and badminton girls) came up with this jingle for our product:
black chocolate ah black chocolate
white chocolate ah white chocolate
strawberry chocolate ah strawberry chocolate
da4 jia1 yi1 qi3 lai3.
initially we wanted to give chocolate massage to athletes.
then tricia said it was too icky to touch smelly sweaty people
and to save chocolate, we decided to let the athletes lick the chocolates off themselves after the massage.LOL
i like tengfoong's group product the most, ma tong wang zi:)
cause there is a heating system that will help you expand your colon and let all then faeces flow out, and not to mention the surround sound system that will stimulate you to shit and prevent you from falling asleep.oh plus its diamond encrusted so that when you are egesting, it will be da ji da li.okay thats what tengfoong said.
anw today, we had the simulation of the stock market
and you could just imagine the faces and screaming of people when TT stock crashed and went bankrupt.
haha and since we finished before the other class,
clemm and sharlene went to see how the other class reacted to the TT stock crashed.
and since kaixin and me were walking back to class from the restroom side, it seems as if sharlene was making out with clemm cause sharlene was leaning towards clemm.
yeah and then kaixin and me went up to them and started looking in at the other class but then the teacher noticed that we were standing outside and said "wah i see 3 spies outside" LOL BOY WAS HE WRONG. It was 4.

oh and the match against nanhua
we lost 1-4, but it was to expected.
lols suay was like "hey sorry for the wind"
but we heard as "win" and thought she was sacar-ing us.lol
TOOK LIKE 5 MIN TO GET THIS SILLY MISUNDERSTANDING CLEARED HAHA.:D
talking about badminton people, meet joey this morning. haha she came up to me from behind and hit me, well it wasnt that hard.
yeah and she look really cute:D she got a new haircut and all.she was someone who i went up to and said "hey i think you are cute.can i make friends with you?"
lols. simple as that, and i think its a great way to make friends with people but apparently other people dont seem to think so.
i tried making friends with weijuan this way and she look surprised but in the end she said yes.:D I know my asking style is weird haha but i think it works fine okay:D
cause i always use this method when i see someone i like at a badminton competition and whom i decided i would like as a friend;D

anw haha im a real mean person.
lols i kept wishing that it would rain so it would not be so fun for the people at obs
and then the past few days it was sunny everyday, my heart was breaking and cracking
clemm, kai and i kept commenting how the sun was too good to be stuck in school and how the sun was perfect for people at obs
so i was mean
i was hoping that the wild dogs would go poking around their tents at night and cause the tent to collapse so they will have to repitch the tent.LOL I WAS THAT JEALOUS.
haha but kaixin was meaner than me.
she said that the mosquitoes will all come and bite them and that they will ahve awful tan lines.
HAHA THIS IS THE END RESULT OF OUR JEALOUSY WHEN WE ARE NOT ABLE TO GO FOR OBS BECAUSE OF COMPETITION.:(
we played bball, or tried our best, before the match on tuesday
had a lot of fun until mr tan stopped us for fear that we injure ourselves

i dread monday
where everyone would come back and talk about how fun obs was.
and gayle said that ppl would continuing talking about obs for the rest of the month and maybe even year
i can feel my heart cracking.
while they have obs to talk about, i can only stare blankly at the stocks ws
and furthermore, i slept so much these few days that i didnt really manage to study save for today.

2010-01-23T01:10:00.000+12:00

I spent the last 10 minutes scrolling through the obs name list to find my name just to see what group I would be in if I were going obs. Yeah, but I realized that they didn’t even include the names of sports people who wouldn’t be going obs, so it must be that they have done the list pretty recently, cause we only confirmed not long ago that we couldn’t go><

Now, we have to go for the financial literacy class, its going to be boring, the only bright side is that the people who are not attending obs and attending the financial literacy class are really fun and sociable people so lets hope that the literacy class wont be so boring.

Yeah, the last few days have been really rough for me. I got kind of upset by my coach’s criticism and I kind of felt cheated cause I had put in so much effort.haha does this mean that I should put in less effort in the future?(:but there’s only half a year left now and then I will be on the a new cca.:D

So much work and kaixin and I decided to use the extra hours next week to train and mug for the coming tests:D I think that it will be fun.okay, I guess im just trying to be optimistic.

And im starting to feel lousy about myself. I used to think anything was possible as long as you tried, but then now I realized that even if you try, there will be times whereby people’s opinions is the major factor.and that mega sucks for me cause I like to have control over my own life.

2010-01-20T02:53:00.002+12:00

the past few days, there has just been so many things on my mind and quite a couple being laid onto me.the unhappiness and misery of it was pretty overwhelming i guess, that i kind of got verly paranoid and sensitive i think.and its true that sometimes when a person smiles, there is just misery behind the smile if you can get what i mean. but i can say that through all of this i have emerged a stronger person.
though some of the problems that have brought me misery is still encumbering me currently, some of the problems have been resolved/ have brought about other events that helped me to know who my true friends are.cliche as it may sound, it is indeed true that we don't actually learn how to appreciate things as they are until we are at a loss of what to do, where we feel that we have no where to turn to.this i know, because i have felt it a day or two ago and the memory and feelings is still fresh in mind and in soul and i realised that i didnt appreciate the past days where i was worry free.just yesterday, i feel that all exits were kind of blocked and there was no escape place to run to.i waas just wishing that i could get somewhere, anywhere, where i could be alone, preferably with just nature and me, to escape all the possible reality and to break away from it all. its really miraculous and kind of great feeling to know that even if all has forsaken you, you always have a friend in jesus, believe me, it i a really comforting thought.it provides the emotional support, like a safety net catching you when you fall and yet always present even when you are you are still safe on the rope.

on the lighternote, we will not be able to go obs with the rest of the level because we have competitions, just like other sports cca.kaixin said that mr tan kim chuan said that the sports might go on a separate obs trip together. if so, it is going to be so cool and mega truck loads of fun.not to mention its going to be tough because everyone there is going to be pretty fit.(just like the fitness of those who participated in the sports camp last year.)yeah but no one is going to know how to pitch tents or do outdor cooking cause there will be no ug people there.:(

Anyway clementine, this i wanted to tell you in person but i got to embarrassed and shy to say this but if you happened to chance upon this blog then, it would be good.haha clementine, i really appreciate that you stood up for me and have always been a listening ear and good companion whenever i am down.i am really glad to have you as a friend-a true friend indeed(:thank you clementine.

and kaixin, tomorrow will be your birthday. i remember last time around this period of the year we were placed into doubles together. throughout this past few months, we have been through many conflicts and i guess we have gotten pissed with each other at some time or another. But through it all, we have pulled through and have emerged a stronger pair. The opportunity to be doubles partner has brought us very much closer and i appreciate what you have done for me
and the effort you have put it. Thank you kaixin.(:

i would also like to thank rina who have stood by me, for bothering to really know me and not caring no matter what rumours you heard.of course, for comforting me when im down and for the happy times we shared at training, when eating, on the BUS, on the MRT, in school doing homework together, haha i felt totally at ease with you:)Thank you rina banana.-please use the wallpaper created by the ingenius me okay!

and thankyou francis,for always knowing when something was wrong and for always bothering to ask if something was wrong. CORN FTW:D

2010-01-19T02:20:00.001+12:00

the obstacles im facing now,
it got me thinking
and i realized that the word "perfect" is in itself, a flawed word.

2010-01-11T23:28:00.001+12:00

i like these two songs, they made me smile:D
and happy birthday jiajin and isabel.
im glad you like the monkey:D

2010-01-09T03:50:00.001+12:00

Does making someone feel low down makes one more superior, or is it just part of human nature? everybody has flaws so why pick on that of the less popular ones? why do outcasts even exist? Shouldn’t people be one?
Yeah I admit that I was mean. Up till now, I don’t know why I did it and why they deserve to be snubbed by me when I should have been more patient and understanding.;(
Random thoughts of a random day.
Go t to rise and shine early tomorrow for training and will be running before training with kaixin at the track;D got to build the stamina 

2010-01-07T23:21:00.002+12:00

got caught for my school by mrs look yesterday
but i could seriously do nth cause i didnt fold my skirt
so mrs look wanted me to undo the hem line, the one that came with the skirt
and i was wondering how to do it
the skirt would look ugly and the cloth would fray
guess i really can't do anything about it

and chingxiang and xinyi was like "what happened to your face? Why did you become so black?"
either people say black or dark
but people its called tanned, HAHAH
I THINK IM CHANGING AND BECOMING WEIRDER

2010-01-06T01:37:00.001+12:00

the swim made me dark and there was the goggle lines.

There is probably about 20 plus people who commented in two days, inclusive of weird reactions: guannan, shouzan, oonhim, kaixin, darrenyang, rae, francis, yiteng, tsz kiu, weiliang, hsiaotien, weiying, yuning, tian hang, jasmine, coach daryl and Daniel, sharlene, grace, Clementine, xiao dan, shao tan, charmaine, kristalynn and the list goes on…

Guannan looked pretty shocked?(:
and rae couldn’t recognize me.HAHAHAAHAHAHA SUPER FUNNY REACTION SHE HAD.

Some laughed at the goggle lines like weiying and jiajin0.0, but most mainly went “omg since when did you come so black” or “what happened to you, you became dark”

Weiliang thought I was sarah O.O and people started saying I was just one shade lighter than her. But its cool:D

And a couple of people were like “wah you went to Africa during the holidays?”

Okay, so people, if you want to get attention, a good way is to go get dark and disgusting goggle marks.CHEERS;D

2010-01-03T22:21:00.001+12:00

im still stuck in 2009, kind of unwilling to move on
i keep referring to 2009 as this year when its already last year
and i wrote 3/1/09 on my preliminary ideas paper><

2009-12-31T14:44:00.002+12:00

today is the last day of 2009 and its time i did some reflections of this past year and plans for the future year to come in less than 2010. i still can't seem to wrap my mind around the fact that 2009 is gone cause it seems to have past by so very fast, and soon, i will be a year older with more responsibilities and worries to take on.
here goes the reflections of this year:
it has been a pretty weird year but i am glad to be more exposed to the different kinds of cip activities: toilet washing, house cleaning, performing for the elderly, house visitation, food distribution, helping at events, flag days etc.
i would like to thank Rebbecca for giving me so many opportunities to better understanding the need for serving the community and for trusting me when i asked to plan an orphan camp even though it wasn't successful in the end.
i would like to thank weiliang, hsiaotien, raimie, jerian and jiajin for all the happy times we shared during cip and the bag of laughs we shared during those times. i still remember the day when we had to do weird exercises and stretching for the old people and mr chua kah seng videotaped us>< he was there with 4f.it was kind of embarrassing for us. and the time we wnet to punggol for the house cleaning and weiliang, jiajin and i took ages to wash the toilet(can't believe it took 3 persons about an hour to wash the loo!) while the rest cleaned the rest of the house. yeah those times were mega cool.
i would also like to thank the people who have helped out greatly with the planning with the orphans camp. Though it was not successful this year, we could always try again next year since we are better prepared. The people i would like to specifically thank the most are francis, jerome and jieru who are the ones who have always stood there by me, assisting me in each and every way.if i didn't remember wrongly, francis called me and said that he was nervous to call the orphanages. i totally can comprehend that feeling, i was feeling that same kind if worries when i called them. Thankyou jerome and jieru for working hard to help in the compilation of the proposal i know that took ages. thankyou gary for writing the letter to ask for the campsite.and thankyou jerome francis and jieru for going down to pasir ris with me to check out the area. and lastly but nonetheless thankyou to all those who signed up voluntarily for the camp and came for the planning sessions: kristalynn, darrenyang, teckchye, francis, julia, lois, jerome, jieru, likai. i think there are still other more volunteers but i will list all that i can remember, sorry if i left out anyone: shawn sim, zisiang, eugene, kimberly, livia, amanda, kaixin, oonhim, ernchuen, felicia, ho ching, rachel, hueychyi, chuan rui, chinhong, chengyu, brandon pee, charmaine, and joshua tay.
thankyou all and im sorry i let you all down by failing to make this camp a success, but i will try hard next year, i really will.

okay enough about cip, lets move on to studies
the first half of the year was pretty good and passed pretty fast,
now thinking back i realised i was not really affected by msn, smses etc- i don't know how i pulled through. the second half of the year was bad, i got hooked onto msn, facebook and smses, being unable to curb temptaion even during eoys. i guess i kind of wasted the second half of this year:(
plus next year, i must take notes to stop doing my paper so slowly, thinking i got an abundance of time.
and i should no longer sleep in class, like hey i don't sleep in class on purpose but sometimes i get too sleepy without being able to help it:(haha whoever is my partner next year, please pinch me when i fall asleep again.oh yes, and i should seriously stop the "heck care, wait until exams then come and say" attitude before i start worrying before the exams thingy and i can't seem to understand anything.haha.

now come to cca,
it has been an eventful year, yeah
the matches like ashaway, weekimwee and that weird competition which i dont know the name has allowed me to make friends with other school people, including some seriously strange people. but it was cool(:im glad they mix guys and girls matches at these competitions cause its pretty thrilling to watch guys matches, i guess they tend to be more exciting, the smashes are sharper, the formation better, the returns stronger.

next i would come to basically life
it was okay this year, and like i mentioned above, i wasted too much time on unimportant stuff
i guess i feel lost and lonely in class this year, probably i can't really find the chemistry with someone that well. been missing my old friends and stuff like that. i guess its kind of like i can't find someone who has the same personality as me. its weird, but i will go on finding.

resolutions for the coming year:
1) to learn to speak eloquently and clearly without vulgarities and singlish
2) to stop bitching and ranting, life's short so i should be content
3) to get my mind off the unimportant vices of life: like smses, facebook and msn, telly too!
4)to be productive in different ways, work cca and life
5) to fully understand the joy in serving the community
6) get rid of the heck care attitude and sleep earlier to prevent snoozing in class
7) start understanding what the teacher is teaching during lessons so i won't screw up any more tests
8) start being me again and not my conception of who people want me to be
9) focus on work and get a gpa that im content with, im not going to say what gpa it will be f0r i have to yet to see the yr4 standard. it does not matter what the gpa is any longer, as long as i did my best(;

2009-12-30T04:12:00.002+12:00

im getting pissed with the computer, its a frigging pig
i just can't seem to connect the computer to the phone and the computer ends up lagging
don't know why cause though theres wireless, im the only one using the computer now><

i went with my parents to IMM just now
M1 was flooded, the store was simply so crowded.
and on the way back, i was bored out of my brains and i ended up sticking my head into my woolly hoodie and then i realised that the streetlamps and car lights lit up everything cause all i could see through the wool was the bright orbs and then it was like a bright sky, brilliantly beautiful.
just this week, i texted two persons wrongly cause they had the same names as the ones i texted, got me wondering why they never replied and i realised it was my fault.

anyway have to say thanks to tengfoong and kuanyuan for helping me with physics and geog,
the picture was so blur and tough to see where the arrows were pointing at
i guess we would all appreciate it if the teachers knew our plight and print clearer pictures to prevent us from going all squinty eyes.-.-

tomorrow, theres still training,
the turn up is bad and my standard is really bad,
have to work really hard on the back hand and netting and recently, my smashing is getting off and the impact is not the standard it used to be
and i start to feel disheartened and wonder why i even bother training

oh don't bother about me
im in one of the oh-wee-poor-me moods
and im acting like a silly bitch
i'll get over it

2009-12-25T13:47:00.002+12:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS

i'm feeling happy now(:
its great to know that it is christmas day and im honoured to be one person who, in history, can be a part of merry christmas 2009. I think this is a pretty special thing cause there will only be one christmas 2009 in forever.okay enough of sentimental bulldog.and yes "bulldog" has become the replacement of "bullshit" cause its alot less vulgar.heh

at the christmas party yesterday,i had the opportunity to have a proper talk to jiale.well, then aunt julia asked us to draw the family tree but halfway we screwed out.and i numbered them wrongly, which made me the butt of the jokes.they were asking me something like "woah you failed your maths?"it was embarrassing but hey, lets look on the bright side, i made people smile.then we went off to one of the bedroom, got lame and started to play bingo. I taught her the trick method albert taught me.Haha.and we started talking about weird things:school, friends, courses, life.she asked me if i ever thought of suicide and i was like haha yeahs.who doesnt, i think most people do just that they don't do it.you can't help it when you are say standing by the window and then i will start thinking its just a topple and i will change my entire life.but no, i won't do such a silly thing cause the last time i told my mother that i didn't see the point of life at all, and she explained that im here to serve others, to lend a helping hand to those who are more unfortunate. i feel that it is true, because if i were ever to say that life was meaningless, then won't those people who are struck down by dieases and illnesses feel even worse than me since they have much lesser in life than i have? but i have realised that since they can live life to the fullest and still be optimistic then i have no reason to give up on the life that they so desperately struggle to have. if im doing so, im not doing the part of a human on earth.

then we went on to talk about stuff, and yes, we kind of talked to each other about our problems and gave each other advice.haha she said that guys were a ultimate waste of time and that there was no point wasting our time on them. MAN THATS THE ATTITUDE GIRL:Di'll learn that from you. next year, i want it to be a fulfilling year, haha i tend to say this all the time but then i always end up side tracking. i hope i can keep to my resolve of focusing on my work, sports and charity work.then maybe, i can find the better meaning life and quit wondering why God put us on earth only to die later.

anyway, here is a nice paragraph that i read in dean koontz's bestseller:the darkest evening of the year.here goes:

because God is never cruel, there is a reason for all things.We must know the pain of loss; because if we never knew it, we would have no compassion for others, and we would become monsters of self-regard, creatures of unalloyed self-interest. The terrible pain of loss teaches humility to our prideful kind, has the power to soften uncaring hearts , to make a better person of a good one.-dean koontz.

till i read this, i guess i didn't know nor contemplated the cause that brought about sympathy. but upon thinking deeper, i think its true. (:i guess a loss is a double sided sword

2009-12-23T21:36:00.003+12:00

the past few days have basically been shopping and more shopping.
though i have to say i don't actually fancy shopping that much as compared to other activities such as sports
they ain't really cheap but they were already much cheaper than their initial prices
for example now they might have cost 59.90 or 69.90bucks around there when their initial prices were 149.90 or 159.90 and therefore, its a pretty good buy(:

monday training was pretty slack and we didn't do much
we went there and the hall was still in pretty bad shape, so after murderous physical training, we went around to find mops
by the time we mopped and swept the hall, we had one hour of training left and ms tan came in and told us we could not use the hall cause it was not ready yet, i supposed you could imagine the faces of disbelief and disappointment on our faces.and we ended up playing a weird game which involves catching. i almost fell down thanks to the weird pipe(:but God blessed me(:
today's training was okay but i was extremely off form, couldn't lob or smash properly and they are my stronger points in badminton, so through this i suppose you know how terrible my other strokes were
coach gave me one on one training on dropping, cross dropping, netting and cross netting and i guess i was pressurised cause i was unable to control my strength and my accuracy is super bad now.plus i need to work on my back hand, its pretty weak

i was rethinking the past and i decided that i should blog about them so i could look at them again when i grow older and forget about such minor stuff
in nursery, i was good friends with this girl called niki who was in the same class as me in primary school
if i didn't remember wrongly, yiteng too, but many people who went PAP BUKIT TIMAH went to peihwa and yes, peihwa is a super great school.kay, i shant elaborate who else cause there were many.
and there was this guy called gerald who would tap girls on their shoulders and when they turned around, he would kiss them, haha cheeky person. i was one unlucky one but then it was way back in primary school and it was on the cheeks only.yes, he went to peihwa too(: and then there was this mega cool guy called shawn and he used to be one of my buddy and we always ended up in stupid mischeif.i have got no idea which school he is in now anyways.
and there was this weird dance we had, a weird exercise dance(:and my cousin, being in the same PAP, did a weird bath dance.haha
had close friends, rosaline and claudia
and kindergarten, i was besties with this guy called lawrence,
and one day in the av room watching a show about ten brothers, there was another guy who sat in front of us and he was wearing a turban
he told us that his hair was very long and we didnt believe and he said his hair was in a turban thats why we could not see it and so we told him to show us and he said he could not because his dad would scold him if he unravel his turban
so lawrence and i told him we would help him put back his turban and we knew how to fold it back
so he let us unravel his turban and boy his hair was long, and then we were actually lying when we said we knew how to put back the turban, so we were O.o
then as we wanted to keep our promise, we stuffed his hair under the turban and boy it came lose again
and the guy got pissed with lawrence and me(:
haha
but it was hilarious.okay i ended up liking lawrence at that time, i think it was my first crush.and i kind of liked his brother too cause they looked the same.OKAY(;HAHA AND they are both pretty handsome, but if i must say so, lawrence is much more fun/
i can't remember whether it is in k1 or k2 that i first learnt to write my chinese name, it was in tuition lesson;D
and then i in k2, my best friend was sharlene who went to peihwa too(:
and we used to bounce around on a mega ball which had to weird feelers sticking out.
i particpiated ina a chinese dance, i still have the costume now(:
and i remember kevin who is in hci now also particpated in it,he kind of still look the same(;
he's a nice person LOL and he also went to peihwa, was in the same class for a couple of years.
shall post about primary school next day:Dto much to post about alr

2009-12-20T04:48:00.003+12:00

But it seems like the comments I have garnered is way different

Since the last round when yang yi sent back the edited copy and nat said that the poems were basically too abstract, this time round, I have tried my best to make it more understandable

This time round, Kimberly says that its too obvious in a way and kuan yuan says its abstract

I guess what ruide said its true, different people would have different feelings towards the same piece of writing.i guess that’s pretty much true.

Since, I have started to write graded pieces or for the compilation of the portfolio, the passion I have for the writing and the fun I actually derived seems to be diminishing fast. It now seems more like a chore due to the stress and the lack of inspiration since my brain has been milked dry, just like a goat’s udder.(sorry for the weird comparison)

Sometimes, what I write don’t seem to be what I want to express and I tend to get fed up. Or I might already be thinking and developing the next part of the story while im stuck writing the initial part since our brain obviously thinks faster than the pen in the hand can possibly write, making the writing process mundane since its slowing down my thought process, somewhat like a liability to me. PHOOEYL

Today, okay yesterday considering its now 12.40am-time check!, was considerably unproductive. I didn’t do much considering that every time I took work out to do, I knock out on my desk and then flop onto my bed and sleep away.Okay, huiwen, you have been lazy this holiday so please buck up and get some work done before you realized that the holidays is gone.

2009-12-19T13:21:00.002+12:00

i just realised that the holidays are coming to an end in just two weeks
i guess i have mixed feelings
i can't wait to get back to school to feel the rush of life, and yet i know i will miss sleeping:(
i will be glad to feel the pressure and the feeling of being so tired i just want to crash(:
sometimes, when i talk to people who do well in every aspect and who lead life productively, i feel compelled to stop slacking and start working:D they make life feel worthwhile and thrilling in some aspects i guess for it becomes that life is a never ending challenge in which we have to pit our skills to the very test such that we can surge further to achieve more.
no doubt, it is going to be a very tiring journey and i have no idea whether i would complete this journey or give up halfway, but for now, when i still have the resolve, i'm going to try to attempt this.
i stare at the dreaded work and i will be like "oh man, this is going to be boring"
and then i get upset, but the moment you actually finish the work, i feel satisfied and happy
sometimes, i would wonder how i would be like if the world was a much simpler place
and if i would have actually done better if i had not been distracted by what was around me.
nonetheless, i would have to say that much as what distracted me has been obstacles which has caused me to fall, they have also made me learn more and in some ways, mature
im glad of this, but sincerely, i hope there would be less obstacles in the near future.

2009-12-19T13:20:00.000+12:00

if i were to fall, what would i do?
climb up again or fall deeper?

2009-12-17T20:43:00.002+12:00

the world is pretty small
recently, i just found out that rui de is my sister's classmate(:
and other cases:
me->jiahui->zoenin->me
me->yangyi->issac->cheah jing->me
me->darren->sam->me
okay its all pretty cool cause we are all from different schools:Dor at least one person in each link is from a different school:D
if i were to think deeper, i figure there will be much more:D

okay i shall go on to post about speaking perfect english(:
yes, i shall stop saying singlish, though im proud to be a singaporean
it kinds of affects my speaking skills
and no more "damn" or "shit" or "whadda heck"
i guess it will take sometime getting used to it, but nervetheless i will try

i will go on to blog about flag day yesterday
woke up at 6am:(
then, i bathe and had breakfast(common thing:D)
and then went of for training at clementi, had to lugged the big bag of shuttles there
but i was only aboutt to go for 1hr of training before i had to go
went home to get a quick bath and then out i was to orchard for cip(:-thankyou rebecca for letting me choose my location
and i think you are the nicest cip president ever:D
met yiteng at 10 plus
and the first person i met donated:D
but in the end we got chased away by the security guard from orchard ion or the mrt:X
but we strayed down and business was still bad cause it was early, so we went off to eat since there was nothing to do and if we ate earlier so we could catch the lunch crowd and bug them to donate
interesting thinsg that happened yesterday:
1)a little boy came up and stepped on my shoe and was unwilling to take it off
2) a mom donated 10 bucks and her daughter donated 11 bucks to top her
3) there was three girls with signs that said "free hugs here" and "free hi-fives here"
one of them offered to help us promote flag day
but her friends say that it was better not to because people might be wary of them if they asked for money for flag day)
4)saw yucheng at the basement of ngee ann city, guess he is working there
5) one person started to babble in another language and then i didn't understand
so i just kept saying "yes, yes, yes"
and by the time he put in indian coins, then i realised>.<
6)someone asked me if i wanted euros.LOLS.
7) we got teased by a group of around seventeen or eighteen years old western guys, i guess i got pretty annoyed
this was how it went like:
yiteng and i were walking out of orchard ion, having used the toilets there
and then, one of the guys said: "hey girls you want money?"
yiteng: would you like to donate?
guy1: sure sure
so we went over
and guy1 asked me what it was for
huiwen: the money amassed will be to buy provions for the poor, free clinic for those who...blah blah...
guy1 donates
guy 2:let's do some charity then
guy2 donates then
guy 2: im paul by the way(i forgot his name, i think it was rodhenisho, or something along the lines)
guy3 donates too
this sounds alright, doesnt it?the next part don't
guy1: hey you want 50 bucks?
-stunned for silence-
guy1: if i give you 50 bucks, then when i turn my back, you are sure to take it out
huiwen: no, we won't.and its not possible to take $ out of the tin
guy1: don't bullshit,if you use a needle, then you will surely be able to take it out
huiwen: no, we won't.we really won't
guy1:so what?you can shake the tin
i got kind of irked then cause i was already pretty tired from the eight previous hours of cip
so i was thinking "wtf, we have integrity even if you don't"
i guess thats vulgar but i didn't say it(:
8) there was this cute girl who went up to us and started saying the rv motto, and the she donated to both of us:D turns out she was an ex-rv student currently in university:D
9) older people tend to brush people off without a tinge of embarrassment but if you ask teenagers, they tend to either donate or at least, when they dont donate, you can tell they feel bad(:haha
10)one of my tin was spoilt, had to go back and collect another tin from sebastien
but it was great because the 4 tins by yiteng and me were really heavy
and advice to others who might be doing flag day:
-don't think that its hard to do at orcahrd. i know many people have this conception. sure, you do often get brushed off, but considering the large crowd, there is a great number of people who donate to.
-look for smokers standing around. though some dont bring their money along, some do too.and they donate generously even if you have the brave the smoke
-look for people resting on benches, they tend to donate
-don't look for high class looking people, they more often than not don't donate even if they are filthy rich. its those more motherly and friendly guys that donate more
-look for guys, esp those who are wearingf long sleeve shirts and jeans, they donate alot-
-spot couples, they tend to donate, esp the guy cause he want to impress his girlfriend.
okay, that's all.TOODLES:D

2009-12-15T15:47:00.001+12:00

The Life of a Corn

I have got no idea why I am born as a corn. No, rightfully, I am a corn kernel but I would rather be recognized as a corn, a corn kernel seems too insignificant for me to be in a world of such great vastness. I wished I had stepped into this life as something else, something bigger, something more in control of one’s life-perhaps an elephant, preferably a human. But no, I’m stuck here in this plantation, suffocated and cramped by all my brothers and sisters surrounding me. It seems like God has made a mistake in making me a corn kernel, no, correction: a corn. I don’t blame him though. He must have been too busy answering the overwhelming great number of silly prayers asking for a new iPod, a new cell phone et cetera that God must have overlooked the fact that my ingenuity is not suitable for a mere corn kernel life that I am stuck with. After all, to be humble, I am considerably intelligent, perhaps even more intelligent than the average human bean (I’ve got no idea why they name people as human beans, humans sure do not look like beans.)

One sweltering hot morning, I could feel myself ripening under the heat. I was just day-dreaming how it would be like if I was born a man (well, I sure wouldn’t mind being a female). I would never waste my time swooning over Zac Efron or Brad Pitt. Let’s see, I would be an achiever like Thomas Edison or Albert Einstein, minus the unfashionable hairstyles though (*snickers*). I sighed inwardly. I would have to wait a lifetime before I could be reincarnated after all. To add on, there is a probability of 23.987654321% that God might once again be burdened by the superfluous problems of teenagers with acne that he might once again overlook the latent talent in me.

Suddenly, I could feel my neighbours cry out, with baby Jessie wailing for she was rudely awoken by the abrupt jostling movement. I glanced up and saw two human figures, a giggling teenage couple, emerging from among the stalks. Then, my world swam before my very own eyes as I started to sway to the right and then to the left. Boy, I sure felt nauseous. Couldn’t these inconsiderate human beings spare a thought for us corns?

It was then that the conversation was initiated and I started eavesdropping. Hey, don’t look at me with your eyebrows raised like that. They don’t call us ears of corn for nothing, you know.

“-giggle, giggle- stop it. What if someone sees us? I don’t want to get into trouble.-giggles- Stop it John. Ha-ha, stop it.-giggle-”.

“No worries, Rose. No one’s going to see us, honey.”

There again. The couple back to make out in the fields-how cliché? Weren’t they actually supposed to have brains> Couldn’t they think of something more romantic to do? Then again, I’ve got to excuse them. After all, didn’t they think that there was no one around them to see them making out? They have forgotten about us corns. Humans have always been so ignorant that they have took for granted that crops could not see. What humans could not see with their naked eye, they deemed as non-existent. If only they had bothered to stick one of us corn under the microscope would they see a pair of eyes staring blankly back at them. Already, I could see and hear Mama corn sticking her hands over Baby Jessie’s eyes and murmuring “Jessie , don’t you dare look.” and Jessie replying in that pipsqueak voice of hers, “Why?”.

“John? John, have you harvested the corn? We need to sell them at the market today. John, where are you?” a voice called out from nearby.

“Rose, you better go!”

“Yeah mom, I’m coming!”

“Ha-ha,” I snicker. It was so common for parents to coincidentally call for their kids when their kids are up to no good. I have a hypothesis that human parents have invisible feelers stuck to their heads, just to sense if their children are getting into something that they were not supposed to do. When I become a human, I would prove this hypothesis right and turn it into a fact. Then, I would gain world fame. I could just picture my portraits or photographs in magazines and books with the name Corn Edison or Corn Fleming. I was still in the midst of my daydream when my siblings and I were so rudely yanked away from our neighbours. The spinning started again, this time in 360 degrees, before I landed with a thump at the bottom of a sack, its coarse rough material scratching against my smooth skin.

A commotion arose as our neighbours were thrown into the sack after us.

“Ouch! Quit shoving!”

“Oof! You’re heavy!”

I, of course, took the opportunity to shift myself to the little hole at the base of the sack which I spotted. Shuffle, squeeze, shuffle, ah! There I was now, with a perfect view of what was going on in the outside world. The greenery was flashing past me quickly. Was I in a car? Was this how it felt like to be in a car> I got hairy thrilled until I looked down and saw two hairy trunk-like legs staring back at me as the sack bounced against them with each jaunty step. I guess I never would want to get lost in this “maze”, what if I got on and could never come back out? Just the very thought put me in a shudder.

The hairy legs stopped. Bulging muscles beneath the hair heaved and then the juice started to rush to my head as the sack was flipped over onto the plank. Then, a slam resonated through the air and the sack juddered. Then, the scenery started to flash past again, this time much faster. I strained and peered sideways. There now, a metal plank faced me. Indeed, I was in a vehicle. The very thought exhilarated me. I was moving at 60km/h for the very first time in my life. The wind blew against my face, cool and refreshing. If only I had legs and could run like the wind. Exhilarating!

Bump! An abrupt stop. I was rudely thrown against my side. The jolt was simply so nerve-wrecking that I could feel my teeth chattering against each other. I was just calming my rapidly pounding heart when fee fi fo fum, I saw Hairy Legs again. He reached over and phooey, the stench of his sweat permeated my nostrils, practically stifling me. The next thing I knew, the twin trunks of legs were striding. But now, there was much more to see. No more corn fields, no more metal planks, but the hustle and bustle of the city throbbing with vivacity and teeming with life. Peering out of my little peephole again, I saw more than I could ever dream of. There were clothes of all kinds: plaited shirts like that of Hairy Legs, simple sundresses decorated with sunflowers, tight shorts clinging to the saggy bums of haggling old ladies etc. Shoes came in all shapes and sizes too: sneakers, beach slippers, Scholl sandals, working boots and the new type I have never seen before. They seem to entwine their vines around legs and just can’t seem to stop their incessant clacking as they slapped against the ground with each step. I guess the ground must probably be feeling quite a lot of pain.

“For sale! Red, juicy tomatoes for sale! Buy two get one free! Come and get them quick!”

“Freshly baked bread for sale. Parmeson, Italian and French loaves are all available here!”

Hawkers clamoured loudly, each trying to overwhelm the noise of the background. Servants were bargaining for lower prices-no doubt they were with tight purse strings. The children wailed as they tugged on the long skirts of their mother as they badgered for sweets. Mothers fiercely brushed the grubby hands of their children off as they stooped over to inspect the wares and goods. The commotion merged to form an incessant drone by my ear, just like a pesky bee buzzing. I was just settling myself down comfortably to enjoy the sights of what humans dubbed as the “Market Day” when bright sunlight shone onto me, warming my taut skin.

I flinched at the sudden change in the lighting for I was lying atop of the rest of my relatives, seeing that I was previously at the bottom of the sack. I turned my head, only to see Hairy Legs dumping the sack by the side of the pavement.

“Looks like he got hairy arms too” I murmured to myself.

Sure, I knew it was mean and ungrateful for me to bit the hand that raised me (or in this case, the hand that had planted me). But hey, I was merely stating the truth. After all, no one can fault me for being a truthful corn kernel, can they? To add on, I am still angry with him for exposing us corns like that, for the passerby to gawp at or fondle with. By golly, I sure do feel naked without my husk, in the glare of the afternoon sun. Does he really have no respect for us corns that he thinks its no big deal for us to be treated like prostitutes in a brothel house? We might be mere corn, chewed, digested and passed out as brown defecation into the toilet bowl, but we do have integrity too!

Clammy, fleshy palms lifted my siblings and I up, the cold disgusting sweat tickling my skin as it cut off my oxygen supply. Breathless, I started to choke as my asthma acted up. The next thing I knew, a red volcano stared back at me, its yellow magma threatening to spill over at any moment with the slightest tweak. After all, what that prevented the spillage was naught but a thin layer of skin. Then, the camera lens zoomed out and now I could see two black irises checking me out, turning us around, probably to check out for any flaws before she “harrumped” and “hawed”, eventually clacking her teeth in approval. Her teeth was missing in some areas, such that when she smiled, I could practically see her tongue.

“One-fifty, is it?” she opened her mouth.

A horrid pungent smell hit me smack in the face. In a fit of sheer bravery unexpected of a corn kernel, I opened my eyes to look for the source of the stench. Haha! Mr. Detective Corn!

Her tonsils dangled right in front of my face as saliva flew out in specks, landing on a couple of my unfortunate siblings, who groaned in disgust. Boy was I glad I was not inflicted by the stomach-upending saliva.

“Yes, ma’am! Our corns are the best around here!”

“Aye, that I can see,”

“So are you going to buy them?”

What came next grossed me out so much that I cannot imagine describing it. But for the sake of you, my devoted readers, I shall swallow the fast uprising bile in my throat and rattle through this as quickly as I can.

So the customer batted her eyelashes as if her life depended on it, stick out her heaving bosom and drawled, “Oh honey, you are such a sweetie. How about one-ten?”

Hairy Legs blinked, apparently stunned and embarrassed by this public display of flirtation. Aye, I felt a tinge of pity for him. Here was a lady possibly old enough to be his mother and yet, still flirting with him. What’s more, when it came to flirting, she was an epic failure. Her eyes look more like they had dirt stuck in them and she was trying to get it out by her desperate fluttering of her eyelashes. Furthermore, damp patches had encircled the shirt under her armpits, a certain turnoff. At this, a guffaw escaped my lips.

Both Hairy Legs and the customer looked up, a puzzled look passing between them. They sure seem startled that laughter was coming from a corn, a supposedly mild and lifeless thing. Then, two pairs of eyes stared at me, shock evidently registered on their stunned faces.

And my heart went into a standstill, my blood frozen cold.

Then, an awkward laughter escaped from their lips, an evident sign that they had dismissed the random laughter as part of their imaginations run wild. Oh how silly they were, but I sure was relieved.

“Oh, you fool! You could have gotten us into trouble. If humans had known we could think and act like them, they will make us their slaves in a blink of an eye.” Corn Nathanael hissed into my ear.

“I’m sorry, I could not help it!” I giggled back.

Money changed hands. I was then thrown into the sack again. This time though, sad to say, the impact knocked me unconscious. The last thing I remembered seeing was a green object with a weird puffy hairdo who introduced himself, in a cheery voice as broccoli.

…

A warm bath surrounded me. Ah, so relaxing, In my mind’s eyes, I pictured birds cooing in the azure blue sky, mating. The dews caught the sunlight, spreading forth a myriad of splendid colours. The water was calming, comforting. Was this what humans called the hot spring, indulging in the peaceful comforting warmness? But this was not to be. For the very next moment, when I opened my sleepy eyes, I saw that I was fenced in by ominous metal walls. The fun was gone; the heat was slowly creeping up on me, starting to burn into my skin.

It started to get immensely painful, and I of course, started to get desperate (I’m not the panicky sort though!). Ahhhhh! My skin is ripping apart. Throwing myself desperately against the wall in desperate pleas, the only reward I gotten was only to be scalded and reprimanded by my siblings. Then, I reminded myself a quick death would mean I would become Corn Edison more quickly, so I grinned. However, I could see beads of sweats dotting the foreheads on my siblings, their brows set into a grim line. Without a single word of communication, I knew what was on their mind: the impending death. Sure, that had to be it. After all, they loved their life as corn kernels and shared no aspirations as me to die a quick death and reincarnate as humans.

Yet, much to my disappointment, but much to their glee, the heroic ladle swooped in and scooped us out of the hot spring, dumping us unceremoniously into a beautifully engraved plate. We were followed by parts of Mr. Broccoli, but now he didn’t look all so jolly. I could sympathize with him though. I guess I would be just as upset if one day someone would hack me up into little pieces and there was no way that I myself could piece myself together again.

“Dinner’s ready!” A gentle voice reverberated.

I looked up into the kindly face of a middle aged woman, her face marred with a few wrinkles left behind by age. Yet, the twinkle in her eyes was unmistakable, an optimistic person she was. Everything about her seems to holler “I’m a nice person,” or at least I thought so.

The cutlery clattered against the glass table as the plates will set down by bustling women in tight aprons. A family of four, well-dressed in finery, was seated at the table. It was evident who were in the upper ranks of society. Yet, for all their class and riches, they wore grim looks of displeasure.

As the dish of us broccoli and corn was set onto the table, the looks of displeasure simultaneously deepened on all four faces. And with that, a loud bark sounded out.

“Madam MacDoughie! What is this about? How could you expect us to eat such a lowly dish meant for only commoners like you. Take it away!”

I was stunned into silence which particular dish was she talking about. There were so many dishes here that I was practically goggling at the wide variety of food humans can consume. Crabs garnished with parmesan cheese and topped with red chili sauce, caviar served with quail eggs, asparagus stir-fried with large juicy prawns and the list went on and on. To think that we corns only have starch and maybe the occasional chicken feces to feed on. How outrageous1

The kind-looking lady in apron came back, but this time she looked flustered. A deep red blush crept across his cheeks, as if someone has slapped her right across the face. Her trembling fingers descended and clamped around our plate. Realization dawned. So it had been us corn and Mr. Broccoli that she had deemed as lowly! At that, I could not help but quiver in anger, grinding my teeth together. So what if she thought we were naught but lowly food not good enough to be eaten by the haughty missy? It was more like we were too good to enter her foul mouth.

Our dish was set back down on the sparkling kitchen counter. Being as forward-looking as any corn could be, I started contemplating what was to become of me, since there was no imminent chance that I would be incarnating in the near future. Lost in my thoughts, I had failed to notice that our plate was once again lifted by the kind lady, heading down towards the living quarters.

“Hey diddle deedle, the cat and the fiddle, …OOOOO I NEED TO PIDDLE…hahah.. the cow jumped over the moon The little dog laughed to see such fun and the dish ran….”a high pitched voice reverberated, harsh to the listener’s ears.

We were just outside the ornate door when a loud “pffffftttt” resounded followed by a resonating belch. A giggle escaped from Madam MacDoughie’s mouth, her eyes once again twinkling merrily. Oh, I could see why she was laughing. Here, the high and mighty lady of the majestic house, who snubbed both people and food, who thought she was superior to other human beings, too farted and belched just like any other commoner, perhaps even more rudely so.

An inward draw of breath as the door flung open, to reveal the disheveled lady of the house. Upon seeing that it was her servant a deep flush crept up her neck and mortification was evident on her face.

“Erm, I was…ehh…just…er,”

Then embarrassment wilted and sheer anger took over,, a shield against further humiliation. The high-handed personality was back.

“Who said you can venture into the living quarters?”

“Erm, my lady, could I bring this dish of corn and broccoli back home for my son?”

“Ha! Do whatever you like with it! After all, this lowly dish is suitable for lowly people like you!” and with a haughty sniff, the door slammed shut. But this time round, it was silent. No more nursery rhymes, it was unearthly silent…

…

“Theodore, I’m home!”

A child rushed out of the open door of the squat, dank apartment, a far cry from the house I was previously at. Theodore opened his arms wide, ready to embrace his mother.

”There’s corn and broccoli for dinner!”

Upon hearing that, the child’s face lit up, just like the lights on the Christmas trees. The twinkle in his eyes was obvious, astonishingly similar to that of his mother. A smile played on his lips, showing off the missing two front teeth. His small palms grappled at the corn, my siblings and I, and sank his teeth into it. As his incisors chomped down, like blades slicing through the air. I closed my eyes, preparing myself for death. The last thought I had was weird. I no longer thought it was important to become Corn Edison when I reincarnate as a person. What matters most is that I must live as a contented person. Only then will I be happy.

Goodbye, my siblings.

2009-12-15T04:43:00.001+12:00

why am i so silly to wait?
to hope?
its all a mirage

2009-12-14T00:01:00.002+12:00

i was blog hopping for the past hour
and one of the particular blogs i went was charity 6's first blog
when i was scrolling through the posts, i realised that there was a lot of quarrels and unhappy stuff on it
i guess thats what happens when you are younger and then you become more open with their feelings
or perhaps there are many intellectuals blogging there and they just have sharp-tongues
i get a weird idea that its a grooming for the big shots they are going to become
and i suppose they will
and its pretty cool seeing how the people there think much more maturely that some people whom i currently know now, it kind of bring back a feel of nostalgia
I'm not saying that rv people or the other friends i made in the past three years are no good
they have their good side and their good points
it just that they differ from the people who i mix with when im younger
a far cry in fact, in some ways
and that leads to nostalgia sometimes when i look back at the past memories or read their blogs
and i highly admire many ch6'06 people because they have ambitions, goals in their lives
they tend to continuously improve themselves and they are not afraid to say so
forward-looking i would say, and nervetheless, the willingness to put in the hard effort to do so
and they carry themselves with respect, being open with their feelings
i guess i should learn from them but the past three years have carved me into a person who is unwillingly to open up myself at times
confidence, the key ideal-i should grasp that more
and strive, instead of being influenced by all the surrounding factors
haha, that is to say
the next time i get affected or distracted by a guy or other superficial things like msn, facebook
i should just go conk my head until i forgot about it and focus on what's important at the current moment.(:-i wish that i will have the motivation to do that
and im so going to do that next year, even if i die trying(exaggeration!), but at least i tried(:

haha and i got to thank lingyue
after i read your blog about your study plans, i feel so motivated(haha!)
im so going to force myself to do more work so i won't swamped or stupid next year
i guess i don't want to look back at the end of the holidays and realised i have been an unproductive fool, so kick me if i fail to be productive>.<

and yes, lingyue's post inspired me to reflect on 2009
all in all, 209 has been a better year for me than 2008.
i think 2008 has been a really screwed year for me, what with my whacked out sister, my crazy obsession with sms(what a waste of time><), being not bothered with my studies etc.
2009, the first half was pretty okay, was doing well and somehow, managed to focus on what was important.the next half was again screwed.kept smsing and msning, even during eoys(i can't believ i wasted so much time!) and now im regretting since i almost failed my physics, though i did considerably well for the rest
but yeah, next year i think i shall stop texting and msning so much
its going to be hitting the books, sports, lots of sun, and to start taking the initiative to read the bible(:
i guess i have been really frank in this post
and from now on, i shall state plainly what i feel on this blog
haha, but there won't be flaming, i promise
oh and my resolve for 2010 is not to be cocky/arrogant and to quit bitching(be nice to everybody)-save people from my horrid temper.(:
oh yeah, and chiong for chinese so i can score an A for o'level chinese(i'll try my best)
must make 2010 a meaningful year so i can look back in 2011 and sigh and say"ahh, what a great year it was"
anw toodles:D
i shall "bounce off"-(quoted by my dearest sister) to attack my biology ten year series(:
im not to the extent of a mugger yet;D
HAHAH

2009-12-12T15:15:00.003+12:00

there was the love quotes
somehow, as i sit by the window, flicking between 91.3, 98.0, 98.7
randomly hearing different songs
and when i sat here right now, looking at the posts of others
somehow i came to this realization that what's yours is yours and what ain't yours ain't yours
i guess if its meant to be yours, you don't have to try to achieve it
all you have to do is appreciate it instead of not cherishing it when its there
if not, when it is gone, then you start to regret and make amends and maybe by that time, its no longer yours
its the same for friendship or lovers,
it is indeed impossible for one to force another to be his/her bestfriend, you can't force the person you love to love you back
it just doesn't work like that
all in all, after trying, you will just be exhausted and tired out, wishing that you hadn't tried at all
sometimes, its time for us to not just focus on what we want, we might not get it for it is not meant for us
perhaps its time we actually broaden our horizons and our perspective of life
maybe then we will actually become more mature and in a way, provided with more choices to chose from since we are no longer thinking so rigidly, so stuck on one thing
and there will be a possibility that we will make the right choice
the choice with we feel comfortable with, such that it will become a part of our life
not just a choice we made that through it all, we feel suffocated-the need to impress, to join in , to be part of it, is overwhelming
and then silly mistakes occur, and i just ain't me anymore
i want to be who i am, but then i end up changing myself for others
so i am hoping that i will make the right choice and walk out for this
there are many a times when i know i have made a mistake, even consciously
i end up making the same mistake again and again because im just too hesitant and reluctant to come to terms to the reality, to blinded by superficial things to see things for what they really are
sometimes, there are advice, but even as i try to change, to forget, to be a better person, i end up straying halfway, back to step 1,
i guess many people have such sentiments about themselves
and i am sure many are struggling to free themselves too
let us all succeed, this time round and many more to come

2009-12-12T14:52:00.004+12:00

i was surfing the web look for quotes, specifically love quotes:D
here goes:

"No cord or cable can draw so forcibly, or bind so fast, as love can do with a single thread."
-robert burton

"Better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all."-saint augustine

"Gratitude, like love, is never a dependable international emotion."-Joseph Alsop

Love is not love that alters when it alteration finds." -william shakespeare

“Love sought is good, but given unsought, is better.”-shakespeare

“Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it is better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.”-(i can't find who is the author, but credits goes to the person who wrote this)

If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden.-claudia gandhi

"Do I love you? My God, if your love were a grain of sand, mine would be a universe of beaches."-S. Morgenstern "The Princess Bride"

"One word frees us of all the weight and pain in life. That word is love."
-Source Unknown

"She loves him more than he'll ever know. He loves her more then he'll ever show."
-Source Unknown

"The space between your heart and mine is the space we'll fill with time."
Dave Matthews Band

"And I will open up, if you promise to give in, on this perfect night, let the two of us be one"-"To Be With You" by Hoobastank

"For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul."-Judy Garland

"Don't force yourself to love, that's why it's called falling in love... you just fall..."-Source Unknown

"Somewhere other than the night, she needs to hear, 'I love you.' Somewhere other than the night, she needs to know you care. she wants to know she's needed, she needs to be held tight. Somewhere other than the night."-Garth Brooks

"You really shouldn't say I love you unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot - people forget."-Jessica(i don't know which jessica wrote this though)

"You can make yourself love, but can you make yourself be loved?"-Amy Brashers

"As long as the sun shall rise goes the old lover's vow, but we are children of a scientific age and have no time for poetry. Still, I offer a quiet prayer of thanks for the sunlight each time I see your face."-Brian Andreas

"So many of us either fear tomorrow or regret yesterday. But, I won't fear tomorrow if I get to be your's forever, and I don't regret yesterday because one yesterday, I met you."-Nurul

"It's wrong to say I can't live without you because I've already lived before I met you, but instead I'll say Life will be better if you're just here with me ...."
Regel Montano

"You aren't going to be his 1st, his last, or his only... he’s loved before; he will love again. But if he loves you now, what else matters? He’s not perfect - you’re not either. If he can make you laugh and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold on to him and give him the most you can. He’s not going to be thinking about you every moment of the day, but he will give you a part of him that he knows YOU can break - his heart. So don’t hurt him, don’t change him, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than he can give. Smile when he makes you happy, let him know when he makes you mad and miss him when he’s not there. Because perfect guys don’t exist, but there’s always ONE guy that is perfect for you."-source unknown

You're my survival; you're my living proof my love is alive and not dead. Tell me that we belong together; dress it up with the trappings of love. I'll be captivated; I'll hang from your lips instead of the gallows of heartache that hangs from above. I'll be your cryin' shoulder; I'll be love's suicide, I'll be better when I'm older; I'll be the greatest fan of your life...."-Edwin Mccain

"Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly."-source unknown

"Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking together in the same direction."-Antoine de Saint-Exupery

"You know what real love is when just thinking of your lover - maybe something they did before, or just the thought of them gives you chills all over your body."
Kevin Carver

2009-12-06T04:08:00.002+12:00

once, recently
in an msn conversation
francis said that i should try writing something about a corn
and that gave me inspiration
this is the first paragraph of happy corn essay by me

im going to TM this whole paragraph cause my sister says she want to steak the first two lines of my essay for her facebook. NOOO. this is from my brain juice. go use your own brain juice sister.XD

met up with the aem people yesterday. so much work to do and we were like ARGH SO LONG STILL CANNOT FINISH. but, im proud of my rats:D with the belly buttons on them
and no teckchye im not childish, just that i see the beauty in small things
and charmaine said my supposed dagger looks like a cake knife and teck chye said it look like a spearhead-didn't know i was such a failure in art
and then so i said "haha maybe im good at abstract art"
and teckchye replied "abstract art is everything that falls under what cant be recognised". i think he is hinting that my drawing is ugly><
saw rina at the lib and then she went into the toilet to warm herself
i can't believe she actually tried to go into the cubicle with me. LMAO:D
went home at 6 plus, near 7 and i wanted to chase 74 but the backgrounds were too big
and someone called me so i stopped
it was coach daniel
ahah and he had a lot of erm stubble.-never shave for days i guess

today i pretty much slept alot:D
and i wrote part of my corn story
i wish my hair could grow faster, jiayou hair:X
my hair seems stunted alr><

2009-12-04T23:49:00.001+12:00

one day i asked teck chye for a topic
and he replied "cookies"
so this is the end product of the cookies essay
(but i guess its not really relevant to cookies:D)

Cookies Essay
by see huiwen:D

Freshly baked, chocolate oozing out from its soft pores, the cookies squabbled for attention. Their doughy gummy bodies slouched against the sparkling metal tray, an array of different sized tongs neatly arranged, just like Mrs. Fang liked it to be.

The sweet aroma permeated the little ring-ding shop at the end of the street’s corner, the sole pride of Mrs. Fang‘s life. The signboard outside hung slightly askew, reading “Fang’s Sweet Delicacies” in cursive monotype. Mrs. Fang settled into her rocking chair, her bounded feet aching after the arduous day of hustle and bustle at her confectionary shop. Business was slow at this late hour. In an hour or so, she could pack up and go home to count the day’s tidy little profit. Her mood perked up as she thought of the luxuriant bed and welcoming warm fire waiting.

Back, forth, back forth. The steady, continuous momentum lulled Old Mrs. Fang into a state of semi-drowsiness. A single tendril escaped from the severe bun at the nape of her neck, softening her hard features that were etched across her face from a previous life of misery. Her wrinkled eyelids slowly drooped, covering her all-knowing hazel brown eyes. Then, her mind drifted as she nodded off.

Her skin prickled, her senses grew sharper. She jolted upright with a start. She could feel a pair of unblinking eyes fixated on her, watching her every slight movement. The stare was penetrating, unnerving. What’s more, she could feel desolation and anger in the heat of the gaze, directed towards her. It bore a hole into her back and without even a glance; she knew where it was coming from. Outside the store, through the third glass panel, fourth shelf, to the life, peering in through the space between the sweet glazy doughnuts and the high oak paneled ceiling of each shelf. She glanced to the side, yet the street was empty save for Mr. Hustler walking past, his hands stuck into his back pockets, whistling a merry tune. Yet, she knew “it” was still there as she could still sense its haunting presences lingering just like a bad smell on a humid summer night.

The phone rang shrilly, startling Mrs. Fang. In her preoccupied state, she blindly reached out for it.

“Hello, Mrs. Scholl here. I would like to place an order for a dozen chocolate topped nuts doughnuts and another dozen vanilla whipped cream and jelly doughnuts for Anson’s birthday.”

-Silence-

“Mrs. Fang, are you still there? Mrs. Fang? Is everything alright?”

“Yes, yes. I’m alright. Who’s calling by the way? A dozen chocolate topped nuts doughnuts and another dozen vanilla whipped cream and jelly doughnuts, am I right?”

The audacious stare was still fixated in her, all the more intense. Mrs. Fang’s trembling fingers gingerly replaced the receiver and then, slowly lifted her weary head, hoping against hope that it was only her mind playing tricks on her. But low, behold, this was not to be.

Two hollow black orbs were staring at her, just as she thought it would be-third glass panel, fourth shelf, to the left. A mop of unruly curls perched on his gaunt face, chiseled fine with high, wide cheekbones and a cleft chin. The faint inkling of greenish blue along his unshaven jaw line indicated a bruise-from a fall or a fight, maybe. Yet, saved for the tightly pressed lips, his face was nothing more than a plain, emotionless mask. A pair of rough hewn jeans-the sort that you could purchase for ten dollars at the flea market-hung loosely on his lanky figure, matched with an old brown overcoat that seemed just a stitch too small for his towering height.

He caught her eye and just a hint of a smug smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. He pressed his face against the glass, as if he was luxuriating in the knowledge that he was causing her a great sense of uneasiness. Immediately, an oily sheen stained the glass panels, blurring the image of the sad cookies slumped in the metal from the passersby. Then, he raised the finger, head thrown back in laughter as shock and distress started to register on Mrs. Fang’s face. Then, he turned on his heel and limped away jauntily, his shoes scuffling as he dragged himself down the street.

Scuffle, limp, scuffle, scuffle, limp. Old Mrs. Fang eyes trailed his heavy footsteps, following his slump shoulders till they disappeared round the corner. Already, her knuckles were straining against her pale translucent skin as she wrung the dish cloth in the fingers stricken with mild rheumatism. A deep frown was embedded across her forehead as the wrinkles wove webs at the side of her temples. That was who she was, old wrinkled, age-the shell of a former beauty who has been dealt a tough hand by fate.

Yet, all that struck her was the uncanny similarity of the smug smile and pursed fish lips-a figment of the past that she has left behind and had never wanted to rake up again. That smug smile as Randy whipped her with the belt as she cowered in the corner, pleading, begging. That smug smile as she quivered, while surrendering her hard earned money into his grubby palms. That pursed lips suffocating her as Randy forced himself onto her, reeking of alcohol and cigarette smoke. That pursed ship lips twisted into that smug smile as he scorned her, twisting the cigarette butt into her thigh, her pleas reverberating through the room.

No, it can’t be. It must merely be a coincidence, a coincidence…

The very next day, just as she had laid her mind to rest, the hair on her skin prickled once again. Her back stiffened, her body going immediately into a protective crouch, At that very moment, Mrs. Yang comprehended the feeling of those being hunted- the unmistakable tang of fear and danger lingering, yet the overwhelming sense of helplessness.

There he was again, at the same particular spot he stood at when he first rudely barged into and unsettled her life. This time round, he was leaning heavily on a gnarled –looking cane, rough and unpolished. His hair was matted back and curling by his pixie-like ears. Ears, that Mrs. Gang knew, closely resembled hers. The intruder cocked his thumb and finger at her, and with feigned accuracy and precision, aimed and pressed the mock trigger. She flinched, he laughed.

“Splat!” he mouthed.

Then, he wriggled his grubby fingers at her down the street he went, his cane clanking against the sidewalk as he went.

Mrs. Fang sagged back into her chair. This stranger, with a twisted sense of humour, was her child alright, there was no denying that: Randy’s smug smile and pursed lips thrown into the package along with her own pixie like ears. How coincidental could that be?Yes, he was her child, alright. She would care for him, love him, and give him everything that she had failed to provide in the past, if only he would give her a chance to do so.

She could not wait…

The following day dawned bright and early, streaks of water of the blue. Business was brisk but for the very first time in her career, Mrs. Fang was not bothered by just how much she earned or if she would have any spare cash to take herself to Florida for a vacation. Instead, her eyes kept swiveling back to the black framed clock on the old mantle piece, busily ticking off the hours to 7p.m. where her child would once again appear.

At 7p.m., Mrs. Tan sat drumming her fingers impatiently against the table top, her eyes fixated on the similar spot haunted by his eyes- third glass panel, fourth shelf, to the left. In a daze, she silently mouthed “Charles”, a name that she had prohibited herself from uttering just all these years. How melodious that sole word sounded to her, comforted her after all those years that it had represented her child, haunting her dreams. But now it was different, he was no longer a figment of the past she should forget, He was a part of the present, he was back.

7p.m. came and went, then 8. The minutes slowly passed, hope slipping through her desperately flailing fingers. It was fast approaching 9 and the last of the little flame of hope was just about to be extinguished. It was then the letter came, slipped beneath the chrome–handled entrance of a door. The sender was sure stealthy. By the time Mrs. Fang has realized the pink envelope resting heavily against the maroon doormat, all was still. It was nonetheless just an envelope, yet it seemed to emit an ominous aura of its own. Its eye-catching colour did not help in reducing its prominence. Even as Mrs. Fang bent over, her aching back creaking in protest, Mrs. Fang knew that this envelope contained no normal letter.

Pale pink, unmarred. The envelope itself gave no indication of what lay in store. Her spidery fingers gingerly opened the envelope, the letter crinkling in its wake as she unfolded it. The words have obviously been written by someone experiencing a turmoil of emotions, for Mrs. Fang could feel the imprint of the words scalding her fingers. Splotches of ink dotted the paper, evidence of many a pen nibs being broken as the author viciously stabbed the pen against the paper.

The letter read:

“I’ve got no idea how to address this beast of a woman who has so unfeelingly neglected her child for years. Even if I tried to, I can never bring myself to call you my mother again. Would a real mother abandon her child when he is in need? Would a real mother leave her child to be continually abused by her husband when she herself knows how brutal his beatings are? Would a real mother run away without taking her child along? You and I both know the answers to these questions is no. I am ashamed that you are the one to have brought me into this world.

You made me feel helpless when you turned your back on me even when I cried out for you. Now, I will make you feel the same experience I went through. HELPLESSNESS. It’s my turn for revenge. SWEET REVENGE.

Just you watch out.”

The words swam before Mrs. Fang’s eyes, running into one another. The paper trembled and fell onto the parquet ground, giving off a soft sigh, as if relieved of the burden of passing along such a vicious message. Her sole mistake of foolishness had come back to haunt her again. Why had she left Charles when he was so helpless, so defenseless against the brute of his father? Why had she been so selfish? Now, Charles was so near, yet so far away. Why, oh why, had she blundered her way out of abuse, only to let her young child to take the full brunt if Randy’s temper?

…

The clang of the metal against the asphalt ground stirred Mrs. Fang from her troubled sleep into a state of semi-consciousness. She opened her bleary eyes, it was still dark.

“Go back to sleep. You still have a long day of work tomorrow.” She told herself. Yet, the air was humid, stifling her, prickling her wrinkled skin with sweat. Her quilt clung damply to her as she shifted to find a more comfortable position. She twisted and turned, but sleep had deserted her.

Mrs. Fang groaned. She sat up and reached for the window handle and that was when she smelt the smoke, the intoxicating smell of burning. Her heart thudded and her instinct of imminent danger kicked into overdrive. Her instinct was proved right when she noticed a trail of black smoke arising from beneath her window.

“My shop!” was the very first thought that came to her mind. True enough, as she stuck her head out of the open window, she could see the front of her shop going up in flames. No, she would never let the sole pride of her life go up in flames; it was her life line and her rice bowl after all.

The streets were still, deserted. The bedside clock beeped, its luminous numbers showing that it was 4a.m. Mrs. Fang could remember her mother’s words resonating through her mind, “Shi Hwa, look at this number-4.F-O-U-R. We Chinese have always considered four to be an inauspicious number, the number whom we always associated with the Chinese word 死,meaning death.”It had seemed silly, even to her, that she could even think of such a superstitious thing at the current moment.

Grappling around for her glasses, she found them by the nightlight. Owl shaped glasses perched precariously on her beak-like nose. Who could hear her pleas? Who could come to her rescue? The phone was downstairs, impossible to reach what with that raging fire going on down there. The neighbours were sure to be sound asleep, her little lungs would do her no good to rouse them from their slumber. If only there was someone on the streets, then perhaps there would be a hope where she could be saved before she was charred to a cinder. She held on to the little hope as the little round pieces of glasses sitting before her weak myopic eyes lent her a helping hand in scanning the streets.

That was when she noticed a dark shadow moving close to the wall of the opposing alley. Limp, shuffle, limp, shuffle, shuffle. The movement meant only one thing, that the shadow was a part of Charles.

“Charles! Charles! Save me!”

He turned. Yet, he made no movement nor appeared to be in a hurry to save her. His passive revealed no clue to how he really felt. Then, a smug smile, the one that seemed so much like Randy’s, worked its way across his unshaven jaw. Then, he slowly lifted a lighter and flicked it once. The flame shimmered, unsure,, then died. Yet, in that flicker of the flame, Mrs. Fang spotted Charles’ fingers wriggle lightly at her, as if saying goodbye. At that very moment, snippets of that letter flashed through Mrs. Fang’s mind. That sloppily scrawled “Just you watch out”. Realization dawned. The “deed” had indeed been done by none other than Charles.

The smoke was already seeping through under the door; the air was getting thicker every second. Mrs. Fang was already starting to choke, grasping air into her weak heaving lungs. Her asthma attack was back. Her knobby fingers clung tightly to the edge of the window as she tried to mutter “help” in the last desperate attempt to cry out to her sleeping neighbours. Yet, all she managed was a soft croak. Charles sure meant every single word in his letter. He had succeeded. But she could not blame him. Hadn’t she made him feel the same sense of helplessness just 20 years ago? She was a lousy mother and she regretted it. It was time she paid dearly for her mistake.

That was her last thought as she sunk into obliviousness, crumpling into a heap at the edge of her bed.

…

The permeating smell of the sterilizer stung her nostrils and weaved its way into her sub-consciousness, tantalizing her awake. Mrs. Fang forced her eyes opened. It was too bright, too dazzling, it hurt her eyes. She shut them again, relaxing into the deep, calming sea of darkness.

“Mrs. Fang? Mrs. Fang, its time to take your medicine.”

Warm, comforting palms gently shook her, resting against her still arm. Mrs. Fang opened her eyes again. It was too bright. She shut her eyes, eager to return to the dark, blank, unfeeling world devoid of emotions. Yet, the shaking was relentless. Already, strong arms were reaching underneath her, propping her up on her frail elbows. Mrs. Fang welcomed the world of brightest with the sarcasm of a hostile host, the world of reality that she so desperately did not want to return to.

Her days at the hospital were all the same; mundane and long. But to Mrs. Fang sure was preoccupied. No, she was not thinking about the hospital bills chocking up even when her rice bowl was gone. No, neither was she thinking about what was left of her charred little bakery or her home that sat above it. Instead, as she lay there staring at the ceiling fan turning round and round, all she could feel was the numbing sense of the strong pang of helplessness as she watched her son walked away last night, leaving her to croak in that musty old room above her shop house. The pangs of agony was so overwhelming that the very idea of her shop and home going up in flames no longer daunted her, it was naught but merely a itch at the back of her mind. She would trade anything, anything at all, even her bakery and home, had Charles not forsaken her that night.

…

The very day of her discharge from the hospital, she went back to what she had once called home. She was surprised to see that her house was still standing, nonetheless, it was badly charred. Yet, there was naught a tinge of sadness or despair. What she had once defined as home was now nothing more than a shell-it lacked human warmth and love. After all, no home, not even the most majestic of palaces, could be called a home had it lacked the two main ingredients.

“Mrs. Fang! It’s great to see you back! I’ve got news for you!” Nosy Old Cheng from next door hobbled over on his unsteady feet.

“Good morning Cheng. What is it that is so important that you have to tell me now?” she answered wearily, her shoulders sagging.

“The arsonist was caught. Must be a stupid guy. I can’t believe that he set fire to your house, and then actually called the police and the fire department. What’s more, when the firemen rescued you, he was the most eager person to know your welfare, even going to the extent of hugging you close. Boy that’s crazy news. Its been the talk of the town for these few days. Oh, I’m sorry about your house too. Now, now, don’t cry. You can put up in my guest room for a few days till you find a new location. I’m sure my wife won’t mind. ”

Yet, she was not crying for the lost property. The tears of joy-brought by her son, cascaded freely down her gaunt cheeks.

“Old Cheng, where is he?”

“County’s Prison. Why do you ask? Anyway, are you going to press charges against him?”

There was no reply. Old Cheng could only stare blankly, his mouth hanging agape as Mrs. Fang grinned and teetered-tottered her way in the direction of County’s Prison. No one else but her could understand the immense joy she was feeling. She might have lost her son, her home, but she had gained backed her son. Or at least he had cared enough for her even if it meant being arrested to save her life.

…

The prison chair was cold and hard, brutal to the seated. The chilly air radiating from the humming air condition made the visiting room the room all the more hostile, what with its barren walls and sparse furniture, not to mention the thick glass panels preventing Mrs. Fang from ever reaching out to touch her son, to ever have a feel of him after the long years of separation. Mrs. Fang drummed her fingers against the scratched table as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat, anticipation and excitement building up in her thudding heart by the moment.

A shuffle. The door creaked open. The gaunt hobbling figure entered, followed by a police officer. The handcuffs clicked softy together. The screech of the chair pulled out. Charles sat heavily into it.

“Charles? Mommy’s here. Mommy’s come to see you.”

He looked back at her with his cold eyes, with no hint that he was going to open up to her.

She tried again.

“Mommy’s going to try to bail you out. Will you give Mommy another chance?”

No answer.

Then, it was same irksome screech of the chair sounded out abruptly as Charles stood, and the soft click as the door shut back into place after Charles and the policeman.

Mrs. Fang looked at the seat Edward has just vacated.

Her heart plunged. Her excitement faded.

Did he really forgive her?

Would time tell?

Perhaps now wasn’t the right time yet.

2009-11-29T21:22:00.001+12:00

exercise and music quenches nostalgia(:

its working
im trying

2009-11-27T20:50:00.002+12:00

its amazing how one could realize how stupid they have been
and then, at the very next moment
repeat the same mistake
i'm a living example

there's so much things that's on my mind now
that is not easy to explain, even to myself
and there are things whereby you don't even want to explain to yourself
cause you already know the answer to it all.

at times,
i have already walked half the way,
but at the last moment, i had to screw it up
and revert back to what i told myself i would not do
sometimes, i wish life was like a sport
i could push myself to finish 10km, and i would
i could push myself to swim a 100 laps, and i would
but such things are most of the time, short term

when it comes to things that have to last some time,

i just can't seem to get it right

the price of one's folly can get overwhelming

i guess its time that i stop being naive and start to see the world for what it really is, for the sake of not falling again. sometimes, i sugarcoat the truth.sure, i do.

nostalgia comes back to haunt me, and i start thinking where i would be, how i would actually turn out if i had gone another school, had led another life.even as i look back now, i realized that i have wasted too much time on things that i have once considered important.on attire, on hairstyle, appearances, what people thought of me,kind of includes everything superficial. i don't want to grow up and look back and start regretting as i am now for the past few years. i want to grow up, look back and be proud of the meaningful life that i had led.

i guess people can't help being superficial, i sure am superficial at times too. i guess it is just human nature. but i can't help wondering that everyone would be so much more relaxed had the human race been less superficial. Girls wouldn't become anorexic or bulimic for their appearances. There wouldn't be outcasts or social pariahs, hence no such Columbine High School Shooting or University of Texas Massacre. There wouldn't be so much of the pressure of fitting into the crowd-after's all everyone is viewing each other as their equal.There wouldn't be the suffering and self humiliation as people try to grope blindly for popularity.

i want to be less superficial and start seeing things for what it really is. Its time i did that.

2009-11-22T20:38:00.001+12:00

today would be a happy post, just as i promised myself it will be

just a few minutes ago,
my sister was " hey why does it smell like a farm?"
then i was like "cause you're a pig!"
and then so she took out her handphone,
and started to record weird snorting and grunting noises that she was making
i think she was trying to act like a pig
now, she takes the recording and plays it to my oldest sister who is studying for her exams-one big chunk of silence.-i can see the -.- look.
i guess you must be thinking how old my sister who snorts and grunts is
she is nope, not seven, seventeen:D
and now she is cutting her hair herself, cause she said the base was O.O

three random things i would like to post today:

1) i think my home should rent out a room to people who just can't seem to wake up in the morning,(otherwise known as lazy bums).i don't think anyone could sleep through five different ring tones and more than five repeats of alarm ringing.-except for maybe for the deaf:X
so one day,i was happily sleeping, enjoying the holiday
when at 6.45 my second sister's alarm starting ringing-it was some silly constipated elmo song, all bright and cheery and so much ear jarring.then after 5 minutes of ringing, it shut up. at around seven. there was akon singing,, my oldest sister alarm clock-and it kept ringing on and on. even though we were sleeping in different rooms,i could still hear it. at 7.05, my parent's room was visited by mariah carey's byebye-that's my mom's alarm clock.
at 7.10, it was my dad's alarm clock-my home wasn't visited by singing from hollywood, but this weird singtel ringtone.and arghhh.
and then my own alarm clock rang at 7.20am.
and i sat up frustrated in bed, and realized that i had training
at least my alarm didn't disturb anybody
but had there been anyone still asleep, it would
so technically, my psychology is screwed.
and then i was imaging how i would promote the above service:

EARLY BIRD RISE AND CATCH THE WORM SERVICE
lOCATION:HUIWEN'S HOME
CONTACT NUMBER:9xxxxxx7
SERVICE: MORE THAN FIVE ALARMS TO WAKE YOU UP, INCLUSIVE OF YELLINGS OF "SHUT UP!"
GUARANTEED THAT YOU WILL WAKE UP
SUITABLE PATRONS: PEOPLE WHO CAN'T WAKE UP IN THE MORNING AND YOU ARE WORRIED YOU WILL LOSE YOUR JOB (PRIORITY GOES TO HOLLYWOOD CUSTOMERS)
COST:$ 360 PER NIGHT-NO BREAKFAST PROVIDED
(THE CONSIDERABLY HIGH COST IS DUE TO THE
OVERWHELMING DEMAND)

2)i got fat and cute big toes-sorry this sounds wrong, but hey if you check out your own toes, you will realize that they sure are cute
i wonder why no one does cartoon on toes, im sure toes will make good characters
imagine papa toe, mama toe, sister toe, brother toe, baby toe, uncle toe, auntie toe, grandpa toe, grandma toe and cousin toe.
just nice-ten of then:D

3) for people who wants to grow taller,
i thought of this, but i don't know if it will work
cause i haven't tested it
so girls, do start hanging on the pull up bar
see, your hands will cling to the bar and your weight will pull you downwards towards the ground
so overtime, you will grow taller, many thanks to earth suction force
don't ask me why im short, i haven't really put this into practice
oh you can tie yourself to one end of the bed and ask someone to pull your legs, maybe you just might grow a bit taller;D
or maybe you could go to willy wonka factory and come out like that guy who got stuck in the telly and had to be stretched:D

2009-11-20T22:57:00.001+12:00

I don’t know what to think or what to do now><
It’s messing up my head
I wish everybody could be less complicated
Emotions is a messy thing that everyone has to cope with
But now I’m in your shoes,
Then I gain insight
Somehow, as we grow older,
We gradually learn more things
And see the world for what it really is.
I wish I can figure this out soon.
But its best to leave it alone now, isn’t it?

Tomorrow will be a sparkier, happier post

2009-11-17T04:08:00.000+12:00

moreover, the stupidity of innocence and humankind
where silence brings forth the peace within
two folds,
likewise, double of the former

2009-11-17T03:31:00.002+12:00

Maturity and Beyond

written by see Huiwen 16-10-2 009

The finger crooks, arches, beckons

One fiery tempest

From loins deep within

The crave to savour the obscurity

Attention, a hunger pang.

A crackling, a scattering

Sparks ignite

It flickers, unsteady

Stumbling footsteps wafting

Tendrils of grey curling

The sentiments,

Remnants of the traces of youthful innocence.

Mother nature awakens,

Pregnant

Symptoms-a childhood rebellion

Agony emaciated

The birth of a child’s maturity

She opens her mouth,

First cries.

The rendering need of her presence known,

The fuel to the fireflies.

It silently diminishes,

Then bursting forth in full splendor

The simple complexity of eyes unveiled.

Crimson blossoms on white sheets darken

A simple recognition

A stunning revelation sets in.

Grappling, struggling, silence,

Sole rat race of social climb.

Acquaintances alight

Another soft butterfly touch

A whisper, gone

Reality, a losing game

Trickling, seeping, suffocating

Conscience muffled, reined

Features contorted into an anguish scream

A round silent O

Epitome of greed

It cackles, withers

The serpent of human’s nature

The bruise of mankind’s heel

Nay, but folly.

Venom drips from honeyed words

Plastered smiles,

Mannequins, abundant

Stiff-backed, composed severe

Humanity-a drawn void

If only it would means survival

A lost soul, a robbed identity

Faceless masks

Meaningless coagulation of senseless words

An overriding eclipse.

The peeking age of the sun

Realization hits

Wizened.

Your life clocks fades in,

Flickers,

At the end if the dark tunnel.

Ominous, oblivious

Its silent ticking haunts,

The ghost of her lost youth.

Ha!

Age laughs you in the face.

i wrote this poem tonight, took about 1 and a 1/2 hours.its actually more taxing than writing a 3000 words essay and i was kind of worried it had many double meanings.thankyou teck chye and ruixiong for giving comments and im glad ruixiong comprehended my poem:D-at least my poem is understandable.shall submit to miss ang soon for a looking over:)

and yes, intellectuals are super great people

oh and thankyou nat and yangyi for always helping me edit my essays

i owe you two a lot of favours;D

2009-11-09T00:18:00.002+12:00

sometimes we just can't figure out how we make a mistake
then regret it after it happened
and then willingly do it again, sometimes it make you happy
but when it comes out bad,
you start regretting all over again
and then the whole vicious cycle repeats.
there's no end if you don't want to let go
and then you're not growing emotionally, not anymore
till you learn to look forward,
and not back
huiwen, its time to wake up

yesterday family gathering was pretty interesting:D
the crowd is basically getting lesser and older cause most of my cousins are in army or married off
but it didn't really matter too me cause Isabel was there:D
reached around nine and then ate, sorry for finishing up the ruffles(:
and then isabel and christabel came from training
and yes, people were marvelling at my world-record bruise and going "ayoyoyo, why so clumsy?"
but at least im not as much joker as daniel
he got a weird marking on his arm under the cast cause apparently, his arm was a titch itchy and his pinky was too large to scratch the itch
so EUREKA! in went his pen, under his cast to scratch the itch,
and the pen cap got stuck under the cast and he couldn't take it out
but he didn't dare tell his mom, so it was there for a week before it got too uncomfortable to control any longer
i admit i was pretty surprised that he could drink a large amount of alcohol,
considering he is only sec1
its kind of young to start, but his mom encourages him, says it good training
haha i sound like an uptight traditional person, who prolly haven't seen the world in ages
then we watched Taken, some kind of mega cool kidnapping movie
but i seriously cannot imagine my dad jumping through windows (he would probably get stuck!-haha no offense dad:D) or flipping over barricades
or shooting and jumping and fighting:P
haha but Isabel was a good narrator, cause some parts the adults were laughing too uproariously that it was pretty hard to hear what the characters were saying
the poor boyfriends of stephanie and gladys were being teased by all the aunts and uncles
i think they must have been tormented:D seems like all the aunts and uncles are sadistic people HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHHAHAHAAH
I LIKE TYPING HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH
and midway we started talking about results
isabel failed chem and i failed physics
and both of us have pretty horrid chinese results
thats why we make such good childhood friends okay!:D
thinking of her brings back memories of how our moms had to wash the void deck floors after we scribbled all over it in chalk
and how she would come to my house
and we unwind the measuring tape and let it recoil back
and then when it recoil, we would jump onto different sorts of furniture to prevent getting hit
and there was this instance where she got hurt and started bleeding
i felt super bad after that for inventing this stupid game
and there was also times when we played pepsi-cola
dumped leaves over each other heads
barbequed chicken wings and got them burnt
and pigged out together during chinese new year and christmases,
and comparing heights and stuff
it would have been better if you didn't move away
but im glad we are still close friends:Dily:)

2009-11-06T03:59:00.001+12:00

CHIPMUNK!:D says:
*nappy is change nappy
*sounds wrong leh
RACCOON. says:
*...
*ok go shuijiao
*hah
*sounds like dunmpling tho heh
*nvm :D
CHIPMUNK!:D says:
*haha yeas
*very funny
*is there any other weird ways of syaing go sleep
*nap nap
*close acts
*or act like a corpse
*of lala lanf
**lalaland
*haha
RACCOON. says:
*close acts?
*watz tat?
CHIPMUNK!:D says:
*close eyes i think
*sounds so literature-ish
*pats myself on my back
RACCOON. says:
*wow.
*should say tat sometime lol
*close acts
CHIPMUNK!:D says:
*close eyes
*but close acts sounds nice:D
RACCOON. says:
*subcumb 2 e lulling call of ur eyelids
CHIPMUNK!:D says:
*mind if i post this weird part of our convo
*want to keep it as memory
*and laugh at it when im old
RACCOON. says:
*haha go ahead :D

and part of my conversation with francis:D
he's an interesting person:D
and a super nice person at that:D

2009-11-06T03:21:00.002+12:00

So I was talking to William just now and here’s part of our conversation
(10:36 PM) William:haha
i know
call him say u cant make it lah
(10:37 PM) huiwen(::no number
(10:37 PM) William:then sincere mah
i got
999 THERE
(10:43 PM) huiwen(::huh 999?
(10:43 PM) William:its a joke
tsk no sense of humour
(10:43 PM) huiwen(::oh sorry la
i dedicated a para to you okay
(10:44 PM) William:haha read
(10:46 PM)huiwen(::nice of me right?
(10:47 PM) William:haha yeah
i also got
go my blog read
(10:48 PM)huiwen(::whats the url
(10:48 PM) William:http://justkiddinghahaha.blogspot.com
;DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD (10:49 PM)
huiwen(::blogger not founf leh
(10:49 PM)William:omg
read the blog url name
LOL ;D
(10:50 PM) William: maybe you too dense

I think I should post this conversation so that when im an old granny, I can look back and laugh at my retarded friend:D (think of toothless grin and walking stick><)

2009-11-04T19:15:00.003+12:00

thank you rina and clementine for today:D
thanks for being there and letting me release all the pent up frustration and hurt
and for being the emotional pillars of support
i suppose life just ain't fair,
but then i can't do anything about it

chalet was fun yesterday:D
went to school bright and early to call the primary school
response for the sports carnival is pretty bad.but anw, jy everybody:D
then went to meet alicia, qiutian, danqing and yantong at burger king
was too tired, kind of fell asleep on the train(hey, i didn't do it on purpose or pretend so that i can keep the seat okay!-plus there were many empty seats then)
after that, shopping for food and the guys came to help carry the food there
but kind 2B'08 gave us their remaining satays and chicken wings so we could save $
and 2D'08 was right beside our room.
a hole appeared in my pants when i fell down
up till now, im still marveling at it cause i cant really comprehend why a fall can result in a rip in the material and a bruised, bloodied knee beneath it
and then it was trickling blood but anw thankyou danqing and qiutian for being so gracious and nice:D we did a silly titanic pose at the breakwaters and both of us could not stop giggling at our foolishness-but it was fun okay! and then back to the chalet, and i finally learned how to play xbox.Binxin and I was trying out some racing game but somehow, my car banged into the railing and starting driving backwards. But there was this other game i played with weiliang which was funnier.cause he kept asking me to follow his character but he didnt know the way, which got us super lost until jiajin intervened and helped out. and then after that there was a lot of fighting and stuff, which i got owned by the aliens(there was weird stuff like respawning!) and the driving and shooting comradeship.(heh, sorry weiliang and jiajin for launching a grenade at your characters-it was an accident okay!)and yeah tengfoong for asking me to practice headshot on my comrade!
poor zihao and yantong had to prepare the fire for the hours, like 5 plus start preapring, then 9 plus then charcoal is readt.so we ate until pretty late, and i must say i make mean bbq marshmallows.haha you can ask the people i made it for.but kind of had gastric pain cause was really hungry and didnt eat much for lunch
and there was this little boy who kept coming into our pictures so we took quite a lot of photographs with him.
and thankyou tszkiu and heping for seeing me out to my daddy's car:D
and also for yantong who tended to my wound.
and for weiliang, binxin and jiajin for helping me with xbox(even though weiliang you are super noob, almost as noob as me:D)
and to weilaing, for giving me a coke lollipop

more thanks:
thanks to jiayin for being such a nice friend and confidant(even though you tease me alot okay!), for waking me up when im asleep during lessons, for teaching me maths and being chatting with me during the boring financial management lessons

thanks to weiliang for being my tablemate for 9 mths, making me laugh when im bored in lessons, for doing stupid things and for your lame jokes, for being such a great advisor(ahem!), nice confidant, teaching me stuff that i missed when i was sleeping in glass, and well, for giving me that spastic look when i cause you to spill your water all over yourself, and most of all, for being my one of best friends

thanks to rina for being you, for being childish and laughable(even if you claim not to), for always being a pillar of support when im upset,for always providing me with polar snack, for supporting me by attending pt, for going to school with me and making me happy in each and every way with your silly antics and care

2009-11-03T04:27:00.001+12:00

so here i am sitting, listening to shadow of the day and there comes a pang of nostalgia
all the small things
Boulevard of broken dreams
where'd you go
perfect
numb
they all have memories, of the past, of something im just not willing to let go
a gift that has yet to be treasured and they are gone

its funny how you could count the number of people you actually know and those who you actually relate too. Somehow, you could end up lonely even if you have many acquaintances. but then again acquaintances does not equal friends does it?
its an odd feeling to know that you don't belong,
that what others see of you might just be a facade to hide the painful truth
and when you try to fit into the conversation, but you just don't much as you try
you see them walking together,
sure you might be walking beside them but then you feel awkward
theres no warmth, just a keen sense of eagerness to fit in
and an awkward sense of feeling silly but being unable to help it
to get rid of the dull aching loneliness
and then you start feeling nostalgic and wishing for the past
when walking together with someone meant a sense of comradeship
i wonder what im feeling now and when it would all end
and when it ended, would it be too late to start to cherish?

sure, i do miss oonhim and yunfei and the rest
and the warmth, comfort and security our friendship provided
yes i really do
i wish i could have it back

2009-10-31T23:59:00.009+12:00

happy wedding bernard:D
and that you and your wife will live happily together until you both are old fogeys XD
and that may God will bless you with a mega happy marriage

today is a pretty important day:D, at least to my family
its my mom's birthday but we didn't really get to celebrate it other than for lunch cause of my cousin's wedding:X
so early in the morning my parents went to my cousins wedding morning reception
i couldn't go cause of the eye infection(thanks a lot dear eye!-but anyway im glad you're recovering:D)
and then lunched with family at ikea restaurant
and then back home caused daddy was tired, there was this war show showing so i watched it with my mom and sister, and boy, i do think its really gross and inhumane treatment of the prisoners on the Japanese soldiers part.
happy running with sisters but then again, my gory wound at the back of my leg kind of stretched and blood oozed out, but i was kind of lazy to go back and hunt for a plaster:X
so now im happily sitting here typing and deciding to revive my blog after i have ashamedly close it a few mths ago cause i was too lazy to post except when on whim, which i guess its once or twice a month:D
oh btw, i would like to mention that my dad and mom look pretty nice when dressed up and all smiles:D-i like to see them like that cause somehow it makes me feel cheery too:D

yesterday was the last day of school and two months of holidays stretching in front:D
Mr Ong was pretty nice, he came in and gave us famous amos cookies, pens with pretty stuff on it/photoframes
Pens with bobbly bits or like bouncing animals on it looks pretty nice, maybe i should fill my pencil box with them-at least school wouldnt be so mundane if i could toy with them during boring chem and physics lessons:Dbut i would rather mr ong continue teaching us cause he is the best teacher i ever had anyways:D

training was okay i guess just that i kept flinching when people started to smash the shuttle and this aggravated my eye which was infected.and i really think that if you are injured, then you will be unlucky cause ppl will somehow managed to accidentally hurt that part of you.

for example, i had eye infection and somehow, friday was the first day that someone whacked a shuttle into my eye-and my infected eye at that(yes, it did happen><) or another example, like the one when you have a swollen toe and people just seem to keep trampling on your feet that day-.-

i think theres a hokkien saying for it:D

after training bused home with kaixin and rina:D and then we started laughing and talking about jokes rina produced a dog out of her bag it was pretty cute and it had this some logo at the butt area kaixin was hilarious, she thought the logo thing was a button then she started jabbing at it and she went "ehh i thought that if press the button will have something" or smth like that, it was FUNNY:D

and when kaixin alighted and i was about to alighted rina suddenly said "eh i want to go your house" so the conversation went something like that
rina: huiwen, i want to go your house during holidays leh.
huiwen: oh okays, sure. But then my house have nothing to do
rina: never mind la
huiwen: -points at the stuff dog-eh you want go walk the dog?i do have a leash at home.
rina: haha okays
huiwen: YOU SERIOUS? I WAS JUST JOKING
rina: yeah im serious.it will be fun
huiwen:-(i was flabbergasted!) okay then...
rina: haha bye bye
huiwen: byebye s
so most likely she will be coming over to walk the stuff dog with me, i wonder what my neighbours will think but after all at least it will be interesting better to try all these weird stuff when we are still youthful then when we become oldies wonder what would ppl think if two oldies went walking dragging stuff dogs on leashes first thing that comes to mind" ehh they mad alr"-POINT POINT AT OLD PEOPLE WALKING STUFFED DOGS heh:D and then went home, and somehow started to talk to mom about ghosts and there was this loud bang and i somehow got startled,its weird how when you talk abt ghost stories, every little sound scares you and then i started whining to mom cause next week onwards i would be alone at home><>

mon mon mon, dental with kaixin:D

2009-10-19T18:25:00.000+12:00

i feel like a super big idiot now><
go figure
it always seem like my best friends are always ending up best friends with other ppl just cause i aint the sort of ppl who hangs out online till super late or talk on the phone at 2am.
i dont get it all.
i feel like such a loser.

2009-09-22T01:04:00.000+12:00

Its been a real long time since I blogged so I have decided to close this blog is shame, or rather keep it private for the moment, and yaye, that means I can speak freely here now(:
Hmm lets recap on what I have missed out in all the past few weeks
I guess it was teacher’s day celebration 3 weeks ago,
And we had a pretty interesting teacher’s day performance-the three yr 2 girls were good
YEP!ERNCHUEN AND FRANCIS ARE HILARIOUS-TWO SRSLY COOL PEOPLE.(:
Then I met Cherie and Yiteng and I had an awfully long wait cause they wanted to give their teachers presents. It kind of made me feel bad that I didn’t prepare anything for that especially nice, attitude problem-less teachers like Mr. Ong and Miss. Tan. In general, I can say that all 3C’s teachers are really great and understanding teachers and that would just be an understatement.
Then we headed down, after waiting arduously long, in 61. It was kind of crowded and it was generally filled with peihwa students from river valley. faithfully, in our heart(:We started camwhoring, okay I suppose outsiders who didn’t really know us would suppose we were bitchy inconsiderate people, but generally we are not(: and we had a super good chat about everything and anything, but mostly gossip-not really to anyone in specific but one I guess. LOL: big eyes, small nose and thin lips(quoted by Cherie) and talking about guys, but not complimenting them or getting obsessed but rather flaming guys(:it felt good to catch up with them after so long.
We met up with the rest after quite long, and we agreed that peihwa people have this in common: we cant speak Chinese well.:(and we tend to have a typical look, its not laughable. i think its true: lets see I could actually pick out peihwa students in the new sec1 level.or maybe im psychic(:both way im right(:
Okay, we did try to act bitchy or rather bimbotic just to turn them off, but it kind of got fuddled because we kept giggling. And we even got to the extent of hooking arms and walking in threes, leaving the rest behind.i guess we just wanted to see their reaction;hmm if I were them I would be thinking:”what did my friends become”?and this pretty much makes it all the more interesting. It was kind of weird to see the rest of the people, even those from other levels and classes. On the outside, you would not be able to recognize, but when you see them in peihwa again, you start to see the faint resemblance and all the memories come rushing back. Back to nostalgia again?
Anw I just feel bad for losing the photos that we took and the videos that I helped someone to take. Sorry people.:C
p.s. maybe I shall take back my apologies from yiteng and Cherie because you two have been super understanding friends(NOT!) when I told you I lost the pictures.MY LIFE MORE IMPORTANT THAN PICTURES OKAY;) if we do have future opportunities than have more, and the next time, let’s use Cherie cam(:
on Sunday, I think a week ago. We went to do our last cip for nyaa
but most probably we will get tgther to do again one of these days(:
weiliang did not turn up:X he told me he was going to but apparently he had to work. Poor you, now you got to finish all of april cip by yourself. AND THE WASHING OF THE TOILET BOWL HAS GONE DOWN THE DRAIN, AND WELL ENDURING JIAJIN’S FARTS IN THE TOILET:D(well, he claimed he did)
On the train, met jerian. He was standing in front of me but I was kind of engrossed in my book that I didn’t realize, which kind of amused him. He was pretty much man in black, or rather man in black or red. IT WAS KALLANG NOT ALJUNIED. Im sorry(:Hsiaotien was kind of late and the guys were joking about going this fashion
Then bused down in 40, and we alighted 4 stops early, so we kind of ran, walked to the area and got that sweaty and icky. Jiajin was trying to roll up his pants high because he said it was warm, it was a good thing he didn’t have hairy legs(:
Cip was great, minus the part about the cat that kept moving in between the bags of food.and the hilarious thing is that when hsiaotien raimie and I went to deliver the food, jiajin and jerian teased the cat until it bit jiajin.HAH.serve you right
The lift was pretty precarious, it was jolting and lurching. Pretty much the cip went okay, kind of upsetting to see so many old people living alone and in such poverty. Don’t adults do their parts?
Camwhored at the playgroud, (:
but nature’s call sent me scurrying home(:
and you know what, I love my nyaa group(:

eoys coming its stressful:X I haven’t started studying, theres so much work
and im praying for inspiration to write my essay

2009-08-07T19:29:00.001+12:00

you are not alone
for i am here with you
though we're far apart
you are always in my heart

human kind is a weird race
the good always seem to meet a bad ending dont they?
but the hope that one day we would all be reunited in heaven
never fades a way.
its our source of light.
so lets save ourselves now

look into the mirror,
make a change

2009-07-18T13:58:00.003+12:00

getting drunk on imaginary beer(:

yesterday was a bleughish day except for night time
okays, lets go through me timetable of yesterday
physics, lang arts, maths, recess, chinese, geog, scs
and then at 2.15 we had physics make up.
and after physics make up we had biology make up..
by the time it was four plus, everyone was grumbling.
as in really grumbling
and then someone started to make the joke that miss khang would come in and tell us " 3C, could you stay back after bio make up for chem makeup?"
gosh we were really that desperate to have a break from lessons:X
i think my brain pretty much died yesterday
rv has 2 H1N1 cases, THATS BAD!
so they made us carry the books home for they wanted to clean the classes
i really envy the container classes cause they can leave their books in the ceiling recess.-.-
unlike us who have to cart everything back.
jerian practically stuffed everything into his bag and it was practically going to split
and he said his bag was light-.-
went home, checked my phone and saw missed calls from my mom
she wanted me to go ikea.
i went all the way home and now have to go all the way back
the food was great and i ate loads.one whole plate of fish and chips and two chicken wings!!
i couldnt help it, we didnt have lunch okay!!(:
and so my parents went shopping for curtains and cushions and etc.
so the bored me and my sisters started to get spastic(:
as in the picture above(:
REALISATION OF THE DAY:IKEA IS UBER FUN TO PLAY IN!!(:

next week is supposed to be obs week for us sec 3s!
and H1N1 caused it to be cancelled:X how unfair
its a one in a lifetime experience!!!
and worst of it all, lessons are going to resume and there is going to be bio and physics test!!
i pretty much dont understand physics:X its tough

AEM was pretty cool.i expected a class of 20 smth people.
but when i went there, there was like only 4 other people.it was really weird,
there was not even enough people to break into groups for discussion.:Xso we had one big group and seem more like circle time.
but AEM creative writing have a field trip and all we have to do is read and analyse passages:)
so its pretty slack(:(:

2009-07-15T00:41:00.002+12:00

monday was tiring
all the lessons until four-and there was no play period okay!!
then icas until 5.20-practically a whole day of using my brain.
and its great, we completed our list of volunteers,

ahah theres many people with big hearts in rv!!(:

2009-07-10T00:28:00.002+12:00

oonhim and kaixin joined(:
now we are abt 20 plus strong(:
and its totally great mann(:
cause everybody is pretty helpful and if it all goes through, our camp is going to rock one big LOAD.
oh yes, there will be no reflection time...
dont we all dread reflections?

TEEHEE
MANY THANKS TO PEOPLE WHO HELPED OUT(:
AND THOSE WHO ARE GOING TO HELP OUT(:

2009-07-05T13:02:00.001+12:00

i made one mistake
and many regrets came later on.

2009-07-05T12:26:00.002+12:00

hello.
i will be planning a children's camp for the orphans
it will probably occur in late nov
i would require a planning team to assist me
and facilitators who really want to serve(as in do it for the passion of serving, not solely for cip hours)
if you are someone from rv, or someone whom i know, please feel free to approach me to sign up, provided you have passion to help out
commitment is essential too(:
huiwen

2009-06-28T17:03:00.002+12:00

i'm all conked out
i just cant figure out what the notes are talking about
mole concepts' all seem to same
why are we learning it for?
other than for good grades?
we're wadding through muddy brains
knee deep in longarithms and all those weird equations,
trying to make head and tail of them
but when we're just want a break,
its pretty much impossible
so we just dont understand what's the teacher is saying
try as we might
and when we're supposed to do questions
we just cant seem to get them right
perhaps it might be our memory space is teeny
clogged up with important things
gossip, fashion, trends, styles
how i wished i had a photographic memory
just a click
and all the information would be stored
such that i could review it in my mind's eye
and spare the torture of memorising
would'nt that be nice?

2009-06-23T22:03:00.002+12:00

heyyaye(:
yesterday we went back to weekimwee, thinking we would lose
but we did well
though kaixin and i half agev everybody else a heartattack(:
we did well in the first set, lost second set due to mistakes(gave people a heart attack), last set was OUT OF THE WORLD
we were leading well and then somehow we made so many errors
so it was like 20-19
then the last shot was shot and then i got so exhilarated i started jumping around like some crazy person(:
and then dixun and brenda could take a breath(bet they were holding the breath at the last few points)
HAHA.sorry about yesterday when i returned half court
and hey kaixin, sorry for banging into you twice
BUT OH YES WE MADE IT.
we finally got what daryl kept telling us
and then when the match was over, i felt that we discovered our long awaited chemistry(:
oh yes, THANKYOU COACH DANNY
HAHA
YES HE CAME DOWN,
AND HE GAVE US TIPS
thats really nice of him considering he doesnt coach us anymore
and that our own coaches didn't come
many thanks to seniors who made it to our matches even though they had their exams coming round(:
oh yes, i forgot to mention that RVBMT IS THE BEST(:
three cheers(: